hey hey..caramel is up again to blog..hahha..hmm....she guessed things arent going too well for her friends and hope that all her friends is well and good and happy and healthy..yupz...truthfully, love isnt the big thing in the world..isnt the only thing in the world..why are we always wishin for it and yearnin for it..why? i don understand..there are so many other things rather than love isnt it? but why human consistently keepin goin for lovin..keep fallin in love....makin themselves miserable..cos not all have a happy endin..and not all will have a fairytale ending...maybe is relly because we watch too much fairytale that allow to imagine and think...the more we think the more we want it...isnt it so? so why make love the BIG thing when is actually very small... not everyone are in love..but there are always alot of other things that we can do rather than love...alot of other things more..right? thats what i thought so...is also some drama show makes me realise so..we should treasure the time we are given to experience and explore....we should cherish the friends granted to us..cos we are destiny to be friends...and fated to be friends..so we should cherish each other more....we should also make full use of every seconds and every minutes given to us.we should? dont u think so...we should do somethin we love and do somethin we want to ....i know is always easy for me to SAY so...but doin wise..for some reasons it is difficult...we might not have the fianicial status to do those thing we want to do..like me...i want to travel to rome and barcelona...but when can i find those money..where? nowhere until i work my ass off after i graduate....hahhaha....i love the place there...really want to go there...heheh...
sometimes i think memories can be hurtful....if it isnt a perfect and happy ending then the memories will bring back more hurtful and misery...cos when ppl tend to think back to those past....then will feel sad instead of lovin the memory...those memories are unhappy and they wish to forget but memories are easrable in our mind..they cant be erase jus with a click..if i were given this magic eraser i would erase the memories startin from the time when we finish O level...yar..i want to erase that phrase..and never remeber...and if i were given a magic pen to write a memory i would chose to amend those memories starting from the time that i am in hongkong...yupz..make it a more happy and memorable memory for the five of us...but who will grant me with those magic eraser and pen? no one...cos this will never happen..is all imgainary...hahha..i am stupid arent i?
somehow,i gain somethin and i learn somethin from somethin....yupz... :)
but learn to live happily and be happy..what the use of being sad? it will only add on to your misery and make u a worse person...
hmm...guess i am havin a flu again..argh..i hate flu...hahhah....i am frustrated cos i cant seems to find a top to go with my skirt...argh..how? thats the skirt i am wearin on my first day of CNY..is like i went twice and i combed the whole area of orchard and even bugis but i cant find anythin...absolutely nothin...nvm..nvm...i will continue findin..haiz..then yesterday i was workin, and to my surprise...ruzaini popped by...hahha..never change...forever the crappiness and joker...a good friend...yupz...but somethin change...he dropped by with his frens...then i thought he was like bluffin me that he was ............. so i thought he was jus playin a prank ah...so i don bother...who knows i really saw him ......... IDOIT him...WHY?? don understand..WHY Ruzaini? why the start? is STRESS ur reason as well? he always like to joke with me....so before i go...he somehow mention ahmad....then he say somethin like" if somehow somethin...maybe ahmad wont smoke" then i say " oh...then IF i never walked away so u and sheena wont smoke as well izzit" then i cant remember what he say..then i walked off....then i actually think about it on my way back...why would i say so? i dont have such big influence to the both of them...what if i never walked away and they still smoke today? it means i am nothin....actually, when i was sittin there talkin to ruzaini, i was thinkin if i really never walked away will both of them smoke? thats quite a large percent in me say NO...i don know...it seems like i am the starter of everythin which i dont wish it to happen...is really...WHY THE START? when in the first place u guys can resist it? why the start in the end? i got no idea...somehow he trigger my memories back in sec sch again..okie..never to deny..my sec 5 memories are the best...alot of things happen..really...and so happen that yesterday i took 27 back home..supposed to be readin my book on my way home but i decided not to..cos i want to go thru all the memories once again...my ears are quiet..when last time ruzaini will go talkin non-stop on the journey back home..hahaha...i feel lonely..when last time ruzaini,sheena and ahmad will be at the bus stop together...yupz..those were the past..and happy memories..really crazy memories too...hahha..those were teh days i saw alot of things..and nearly got into seein a real fight..and miss out some fun butt always havin fun..hahhha..argh..stupid ruzaini make me think back...hahhaha..but this will always be in myy mind..cos i have to move on..and everyone moved on...yupz..sometime it feels good takin the old memories out and see thru it again...it feels good..but one must know when to stop and come bacck to reality...hahha..yar..but is good seein him though..."OI ruzaini, GREW muscular.... ehem....show me ur stomach and make me laugh.." hahhahahaaha.....drop by often yar..hahhaha....
and yesterday had a day out with F4...but drop by Mj shop first..then went to find them..hahah.okie...all havin new hairstyles...not bad ah..really not bad..BAO still the best lahz..so brave for that color..but the color will fade..and luo's hair also not bad...yeo also...but should color more..hahahaha....then vin poor thin can only cut hair but not color..but don worry..vin..i also never color..i accompany u lahz..hahahhaha...great day...eventful day...yeah....
The endin decide what kind of memory will be deeply etched in your mind,
You cant erase it,
You cant forget it,
You jus have to get over it and move on.
Take out those happy memories once awhile to see thru it again.
Cos thats what memories are for.
Lazy sleepy and rushin for assignment Chunpei-sigin off...
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Thursday, January 27, 2005
oh..caramel needs to smile..she needs to be happy..and she did what she said..cos she wont let someone stupid to control her emotions..yupz...heheh... :) and she feel alive again...wahz..some tv shows impact can be that big....
wahz..today i think is sort of my day eh..hahha...had quite a good day though..at the early part of my day, me cher and jiayi had super fun at the foodcourt jokin..really jokin man..is like teasin cher ah..hahhahah....she super funnny..really man..make me laugh and laugh..and she with her biscuits...hahha...keep up the good work man..and hor i think jiayi is becomin lamer this sems..cos she mixed with cher too much lahz..hahha..*jiayi mix more with me* ahhahaha...then after that we went to watch MR. Fightin...oh so nice man..so touching..oh gosh..how can some guys fall in love until so deep..how i wish i am the leadin actress....hahhaha...really man so sweet..yet she still say somethin to hurt him..so poor thing and sad..hahhah..then after watchin i did my poster and it turn out SUCKS!! not again..YES IT IS AGAIN..SUCKS!! my work SUCKS!! haiz..no choice..last min work are like that one..haiz...then after that got my netball..huurray..netball..today was a tough one though cos we had alot of runs..heheh..then after that we went to eat and drink..i drink bubble tea...hahha..we all drank..then sat down...then we talked..were hapyp that rhoda and mary joined us..heehh..cos is like they always never joined us...yupz.then after that got a bad news of wei's fren happen to be my sec sch mate..then yupz..quite shockin and sad...then on the way home..my ex-collgues chris called me..hmm..quite surprise..i think he too bored in camp then call me and crap..wahz..he made my day alittle lahz..cos he keep makin me laugh..serious sia..i think the ppl in mrt are all starin at me man...so paisehz..he can really crap non-stop sia..then somehow he triggered those memories i had workin with him,eve,caren and frankie...really man..remeber those times, when i stand there starin at the sercurity entrance..waitin for either of them to appear to start work..cos by then got someone to chat with me..then last time he always bully me..then i also always bully him...we always like bicker ah..so funn...then eve and frankie and caren will stare and laugh only..then me eve and caren always have our girls workin days..then we will gossip and chit chat..thats what girls do best right? hehhe..yupz..oh my..miss those times again..although workin is tirin..but is nicec and good when i get fun and laughters too..hehe..miss eve alot alot..she used to call me'pei pei..hahha..she is so cute..and miss caren..always come and accompany us...then frankis sometime will contribute some jokes...aiyo..those time so fun...how nicee if we were to work again...miss them lots..then jus now saw benny also...happen that we took the same train..yupz..then chatted as we walked home..nicee seein him though..cos last time durin sec sch we always take bus t sch together..hahaha...talk alot of stuffs and crap too..hahha..then jus now sheena say nite and tc...wanted to reply her then she offline..guess wil msg her later..hehe..
okok..need to sleep..later got manu and chelsea match..hehehe....man u will win..
okok..
blog more tml..
wahz..today i think is sort of my day eh..hahha...had quite a good day though..at the early part of my day, me cher and jiayi had super fun at the foodcourt jokin..really jokin man..is like teasin cher ah..hahhahah....she super funnny..really man..make me laugh and laugh..and she with her biscuits...hahha...keep up the good work man..and hor i think jiayi is becomin lamer this sems..cos she mixed with cher too much lahz..hahha..*jiayi mix more with me* ahhahaha...then after that we went to watch MR. Fightin...oh so nice man..so touching..oh gosh..how can some guys fall in love until so deep..how i wish i am the leadin actress....hahhaha...really man so sweet..yet she still say somethin to hurt him..so poor thing and sad..hahhah..then after watchin i did my poster and it turn out SUCKS!! not again..YES IT IS AGAIN..SUCKS!! my work SUCKS!! haiz..no choice..last min work are like that one..haiz...then after that got my netball..huurray..netball..today was a tough one though cos we had alot of runs..heheh..then after that we went to eat and drink..i drink bubble tea...hahha..we all drank..then sat down...then we talked..were hapyp that rhoda and mary joined us..heehh..cos is like they always never joined us...yupz.then after that got a bad news of wei's fren happen to be my sec sch mate..then yupz..quite shockin and sad...then on the way home..my ex-collgues chris called me..hmm..quite surprise..i think he too bored in camp then call me and crap..wahz..he made my day alittle lahz..cos he keep makin me laugh..serious sia..i think the ppl in mrt are all starin at me man...so paisehz..he can really crap non-stop sia..then somehow he triggered those memories i had workin with him,eve,caren and frankie...really man..remeber those times, when i stand there starin at the sercurity entrance..waitin for either of them to appear to start work..cos by then got someone to chat with me..then last time he always bully me..then i also always bully him...we always like bicker ah..so funn...then eve and frankie and caren will stare and laugh only..then me eve and caren always have our girls workin days..then we will gossip and chit chat..thats what girls do best right? hehhe..yupz..oh my..miss those times again..although workin is tirin..but is nicec and good when i get fun and laughters too..hehe..miss eve alot alot..she used to call me'pei pei..hahha..she is so cute..and miss caren..always come and accompany us...then frankis sometime will contribute some jokes...aiyo..those time so fun...how nicee if we were to work again...miss them lots..then jus now saw benny also...happen that we took the same train..yupz..then chatted as we walked home..nicee seein him though..cos last time durin sec sch we always take bus t sch together..hahaha...talk alot of stuffs and crap too..hahha..then jus now sheena say nite and tc...wanted to reply her then she offline..guess wil msg her later..hehe..
okok..need to sleep..later got manu and chelsea match..hehehe....man u will win..
okok..
blog more tml..
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
haiyo..everytime watchin that show..caramel will get so touched...but somehow everytime after watchin that show..she learned somethin about life...life is fragile..u never know when u wil be the next to go away from this earth...she saw how affected those loved ones are when he/she goes..she could also feel the heartache they felt...is true..it showed..ppl always say"Hao Ren You Hao Pao" means u will gain if u do a deed...but somehow no matter in real life or shows this doesnt shows at all...is always the good people suffering...then why bother be good? doin many good deeds..helpin people but in the end still have to facec death earlier and sufferings...But she admired that passion and spirit of this dying girl...her never give up attitude..her strong willed to live...yar..she is correct..i rather do somethin then wastin my time lyin on the bed waiting for death....and really treasure every moment given to you...every seconds that u were granted...is not everyone is given so much time as caramel had..if she was unlucky she might not be here writin all this...so somehow she is also glad that she is given so much time to see this world...to see so many things..and understand things...she did come thru...why would her emotions be controlled? how could somehow controlled her emotions? it should be she herself controllin her emotions..she should be happy and happy...maybe the only reason she isnt happy is 'What is she livin for?" she have yet to find any answer..maybe if there is the reason, she will be happier....yupz..and the show really insipred her alot...saw how precious life is, saw how ppl are willin to save a life to sacrifice his own life..saw how selfless ppl are...saw how helpful friends could be...saw how big responsiblity pilot have to take...why is caramel still grumblin about her life when is cant be any perfect..she should learn more about life...learn more bout how she could help..maybe this is better? and she promise to be happy and happy!! :) no more grumpy!!!
yupz..today i werent happy...never smile in this single day...i was myself..but found no meanin, energy to fake out a smile...sorry..i know jiayi and cher have been askin me this mornin..but i don know..i don feel like talking..jus remainin silence....things are in my mind..and i have to stop it..and i know that i could do it now after watchin that show..Jiayi asked me a question today...and if she asked me one month later..maybe my answer will be a NO! a definite NO!! yar...and today suppose to be hyper and happy..cos is TUE!! but i arent...cos we always disturb JOE and Cher..but today JOe never sit with us..and i arent in the mood to disturb or tease anyone...maybe plus i am tired..but i will never be like this again..cos i straighten out my thoughts..and i think it over and over...why? why? is always like that..i am tired of it ready..havin no endin in the end..so whats the point right? yupz..so why make myself miserable over somethin...i should jus have a bigger picture of it...dont i? i need to grow up..i need to think more mature..i need to do jus that...yupz..and i have one poster assignment due this friday...argh..have the ideas..but is like is TEACHER's ideas again..i mean part of it lahz..haiz...
nose is so itchin and sneezin all the way..argh....hahhah..need to buck up and study also ..although no exams..but i have to...don wish to retain..and i think i wil be happyh tml..cos got Mr fighter to watch..hahhahahha..yeap...and tml got netballl..yeah...okok...
nose red....sleepy Chunpei signin off....
yupz..today i werent happy...never smile in this single day...i was myself..but found no meanin, energy to fake out a smile...sorry..i know jiayi and cher have been askin me this mornin..but i don know..i don feel like talking..jus remainin silence....things are in my mind..and i have to stop it..and i know that i could do it now after watchin that show..Jiayi asked me a question today...and if she asked me one month later..maybe my answer will be a NO! a definite NO!! yar...and today suppose to be hyper and happy..cos is TUE!! but i arent...cos we always disturb JOE and Cher..but today JOe never sit with us..and i arent in the mood to disturb or tease anyone...maybe plus i am tired..but i will never be like this again..cos i straighten out my thoughts..and i think it over and over...why? why? is always like that..i am tired of it ready..havin no endin in the end..so whats the point right? yupz..so why make myself miserable over somethin...i should jus have a bigger picture of it...dont i? i need to grow up..i need to think more mature..i need to do jus that...yupz..and i have one poster assignment due this friday...argh..have the ideas..but is like is TEACHER's ideas again..i mean part of it lahz..haiz...
nose is so itchin and sneezin all the way..argh....hahhah..need to buck up and study also ..although no exams..but i have to...don wish to retain..and i think i wil be happyh tml..cos got Mr fighter to watch..hahhahahha..yeap...and tml got netballl..yeah...okok...
nose red....sleepy Chunpei signin off....
caramel haven been feelin good though...cos of some reason and the tiredness in her...sometime she wonders what have she done to herself? makin herself miserable...? when somethin can be prevented she did not stop it and let it happen..she is always like that...argh...she really really hate herself...stupid things keep happenin...and she couldnt control...once again she is silenece again................
yesterday i went to pasir ris for my uncle housewarmin...heheh..i saw my cute little cousins..she is so cute and sweet and nice..hahhaha...and my uncle's house so nice..nicer than mine...really..the room like my old house so big..can put alot of things..not like my house now..so small...put a bed got no space for other stuffs...yar..then went home late..tired..need to call ben for the meeting thingy..then after that do somethin and finally went to sleep..so tired..this few days i have been so damm tired..unexplainable tired...then i think every monday get to see ashraf...beside bao he is the only other sch mates i can find in this big POLY...hahhhaah....so sometime talkin to him bring back sec sch memories...argh..hahhahhah....sec sch...haiz...and i bet no one in this poly call him clark kent except for those sec sch mates..hahhah...somehow is quite pathetic...those sec sch mates i still got contact is F4,ruzaini,faisal,yen wei,ashraf....i think thats all man..hahha..i lost contact with janice...wonder how she has been doin...heheh..yupz..and then i have been feelin down down down...someone help me? yupz..have two assignment to hand up this fri and i haven even started..what the hell am i doin..argh...how come this sems i am so damm damm freakin slack...haiz...
moody Chunpei---signin off---
yesterday i went to pasir ris for my uncle housewarmin...heheh..i saw my cute little cousins..she is so cute and sweet and nice..hahhaha...and my uncle's house so nice..nicer than mine...really..the room like my old house so big..can put alot of things..not like my house now..so small...put a bed got no space for other stuffs...yar..then went home late..tired..need to call ben for the meeting thingy..then after that do somethin and finally went to sleep..so tired..this few days i have been so damm tired..unexplainable tired...then i think every monday get to see ashraf...beside bao he is the only other sch mates i can find in this big POLY...hahhhaah....so sometime talkin to him bring back sec sch memories...argh..hahhahhah....sec sch...haiz...and i bet no one in this poly call him clark kent except for those sec sch mates..hahhah...somehow is quite pathetic...those sec sch mates i still got contact is F4,ruzaini,faisal,yen wei,ashraf....i think thats all man..hahha..i lost contact with janice...wonder how she has been doin...heheh..yupz..and then i have been feelin down down down...someone help me? yupz..have two assignment to hand up this fri and i haven even started..what the hell am i doin..argh...how come this sems i am so damm damm freakin slack...haiz...
moody Chunpei---signin off---
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Caramel hate herself again...for doin somethin---Thats the bottom line!!
What the hell..i work my ass off on HARI RAYA HAJI...work my butt off on a holiday when i should be enjoying...what is this..what the hell....then i get shitty customers and some attitudee...what is this..i work 12 long hours..and in the end i never even get a THANKS?? what is this?? haiz...but lucky got sally if not i can jump down .....12 freakin long hours..doin this doin that...makin coffee makin frappe..cleanin washin..everythin..doin everythin...argh..what is this..what is this?? then today also suppose to work..but i got somethin on so couldnt work..lucky man...haiz..then i ate tom yum today okie lahz..not bad...is sour but not spicy enough..then after that eat the FEN YUAN desert..very nice..then went town shop although we are all very tired..really very shag...cos all so tired after spendin 1 hour plus in the pool doin nothin..hahha...cant imagine if kenny were to join us...bet he will fall asleep in the pool..hahhaha..then after that i bought JAY ZHOU album eh..the live concert one..shiok..hahha..then went home..cant seem to find any tops for my CNY clothes..HELP!!! hahahha...okok... very sleepy ready..hmm...have i talk about thur thingy? is we went to eat after their soccer trainin..then is has been very long since all of us went out..the green gang and the four of us...this time all of us went...victor,brandon,small daniel,yonghua and kenny, nette,meijie,yen wei and me..hehehe..and this time ah fat and suhairi also join us...wahz..had a great time though is quite short..yupz...hehee...okok...actually sorrtt of hate myself that time for some reason that i am hidin...yupz..haiz..okko..shall stop here.my eyes closin already...
Sorry MANU cant watch ur match....eyes closed! :)
Sleepy,tired,exhuasted Chunpei--sign off--
What the hell..i work my ass off on HARI RAYA HAJI...work my butt off on a holiday when i should be enjoying...what is this..what the hell....then i get shitty customers and some attitudee...what is this..i work 12 long hours..and in the end i never even get a THANKS?? what is this?? haiz...but lucky got sally if not i can jump down .....12 freakin long hours..doin this doin that...makin coffee makin frappe..cleanin washin..everythin..doin everythin...argh..what is this..what is this?? then today also suppose to work..but i got somethin on so couldnt work..lucky man...haiz..then i ate tom yum today okie lahz..not bad...is sour but not spicy enough..then after that eat the FEN YUAN desert..very nice..then went town shop although we are all very tired..really very shag...cos all so tired after spendin 1 hour plus in the pool doin nothin..hahha...cant imagine if kenny were to join us...bet he will fall asleep in the pool..hahhaha..then after that i bought JAY ZHOU album eh..the live concert one..shiok..hahha..then went home..cant seem to find any tops for my CNY clothes..HELP!!! hahahha...okok... very sleepy ready..hmm...have i talk about thur thingy? is we went to eat after their soccer trainin..then is has been very long since all of us went out..the green gang and the four of us...this time all of us went...victor,brandon,small daniel,yonghua and kenny, nette,meijie,yen wei and me..hehehe..and this time ah fat and suhairi also join us...wahz..had a great time though is quite short..yupz...hehee...okok...actually sorrtt of hate myself that time for some reason that i am hidin...yupz..haiz..okko..shall stop here.my eyes closin already...
Sorry MANU cant watch ur match....eyes closed! :)
Sleepy,tired,exhuasted Chunpei--sign off--
Thursday, January 20, 2005
should i say that caramel had a bad dream or a wonderful dream...to her..it seems like somethin dramatic..is like she dream of somehtin nicec..jus when that somethin nice..sweet thing about to happen her alarm rang...and she woke up and press STOP..then she immediately went back to sleep and hopin to continue havin that same dream..but then she realise..she is wide awake...she cant go back sleep..she cant continue dreamin ...she dont know the ending..and somehow the dream really stop at the time when the answer was jus about to be out...is like dont u guys find it dramatic..caramel herself really think likewise...at first she is happy about that dream..but after that come to think of it, it seems like somethin bad..not sometin good...argh....and yesterday she think of this phrase.."single but heart's unavailable'...good phrase man..hahhahha....caramel is confuse again..the JUST DO IT slogan didnt work on her...she broke her promise..and cant abide to it..yupz...she thought she could..but this time everytime when she intend to give up..things will cock up and make her cant give up..why must things always be like that? and nowadays her thinkings are terribly bad..and terribly not right..she have to stop thinkin so much...sEE...is the THINKINGS again....hahhahaha....
today actually i had a great day in school although i was super tired and lethargic...but then drawin lesson i didnt really drew well..didnt have the concentration though cos was very tired..then after that got to know dont have CRS..so in total i have 3 hours of break..wahz..3 hours what to do sia? then in the end i went to slack at SPORTS club..hahhha..so unusual of me...hahhaha..then after that it was funny in there..cos that suhairi keep talkin rubbish with me..and i always make fun of him and........ hahha..then i ask him to stop disturbin me...he is irritatin..cant stop him ah..then after taht had WEBP then me and jiayi keep laughin and laughin non-stop..we had a great time today man...in the foodcourt we are also laughin..then in lesson we also laughin..but we also got do our work..hehhe..then after taht went to watch them play soccer..i really also feel like playin soccer lehz..haahha...yupz..then after that we are went clementi to eat..finally the whole gang of them are there...haahha...jus missed out ryan...yupz..so long since everyone of us gathered together...hahha...miss those times though...then we talk rubbish and crap alot..and i had bubble tea again...twice in two days..hahha..then i hate myself jus now though...yar..then after that we took train home..and tml is hari raya haji..and i am workin..ppl holiday i am workin...argh....sad..nvm..work hard to earn money..hahhaha...yeah yeah...
liveless...tired..sleepy Chunpei signin off---
today actually i had a great day in school although i was super tired and lethargic...but then drawin lesson i didnt really drew well..didnt have the concentration though cos was very tired..then after that got to know dont have CRS..so in total i have 3 hours of break..wahz..3 hours what to do sia? then in the end i went to slack at SPORTS club..hahhha..so unusual of me...hahhaha..then after that it was funny in there..cos that suhairi keep talkin rubbish with me..and i always make fun of him and........ hahha..then i ask him to stop disturbin me...he is irritatin..cant stop him ah..then after taht had WEBP then me and jiayi keep laughin and laughin non-stop..we had a great time today man...in the foodcourt we are also laughin..then in lesson we also laughin..but we also got do our work..hehhe..then after taht went to watch them play soccer..i really also feel like playin soccer lehz..haahha...yupz..then after that we are went clementi to eat..finally the whole gang of them are there...haahha...jus missed out ryan...yupz..so long since everyone of us gathered together...hahha...miss those times though...then we talk rubbish and crap alot..and i had bubble tea again...twice in two days..hahha..then i hate myself jus now though...yar..then after that we took train home..and tml is hari raya haji..and i am workin..ppl holiday i am workin...argh....sad..nvm..work hard to earn money..hahhaha...yeah yeah...
liveless...tired..sleepy Chunpei signin off---
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
caramel is once again touched..and somehow she is happy today..cos she had fun with her GANG!!! Hurray..hahahaha..and she watched this show..which is very nice..a Hongkong drama..then this couple is very lovin..and there is some misunderstandin between both of them..then the husband went overseas and meet with an incident and died...and she realise that she do love her husband...and she is sad and depressed over his death..and somehow she cannot take the blow...and somehow caramel can feel her pain..feel her saddness...is like losin the LOVED ONES in this world..and moreover the misundertandin have yet to be solved...and she have yet to give him an explanations..and he passed away...of cos she if grief over it..sad over it..depressed over it...and somehow everythin that concerns about her husband..make her think back about those happy times..and lovin times..and everytime when she think about it..tears will roll down...is somethin like... you feel so lost when ur loved ones used to make u happy..make u smile..be there when u needed him..and accompany...and suddenly he disappeared..u cannot imagine life without him...yar..is those kind of pain..then now the other side..another couple..the girl is down with some illness..some relapse...then she realise the phrase of "Enjoyin the proceess and ignore the outcome" so she wanna make use of the time she have and live life to the fullest...so she is happy everytime..and she wanted to spend her happiest moment with the guy of her life..so she planned a holiday ....came up with some excuses..but the guy didnt get the hint..and told her to go alone..btu in the end he gave her a SURPRISE...appeared in the plane and somemore he got a first class SEATS!! wahz..thats totally awesome...so sweet isnt it..haha..the girl must be gloated and happy like heaven..hehehe...they went ROME...oh my..that place is also totally nice and great and romantic....emotions will grow stronger there...and there are so happy there...the thing about travellin oversea is that one can forget about the trouble in their country and leave with a fun,relaxin heart to that country..and ppl tend to be happier... isnt that correct..heehe.....and now caramel also wanna travel to that place...wanna go to ROME..the buildin there are so different unique and nicec..heehehhe.....caramel feels so happy seein this happy couple..heehh..yeah yeah..
oh yeah..today i am happy...somehow so..ahhha..cos whenever we had our gems we will go crazy..cos got that JOE guy ....we everytime disturb him and cher..haha...don know why also..me and jiayi always gang up to disturb the two of them..and i had curly fries in sch today also..so nice..!! YUMMY..hehhe..then went home early today..wahz..so unusual of me.hehehe..yupz..then i went runnin..wahz..runnin sehz..hahah..since how long i never run around my house compound...yar...then me and jiayi is super vexin about the elective module to choose...haiz...what to chose..somethin i like or soemthin more concernin to future? ARGH!! DAMM!! I REALLY GOT NO IDEA!!!HOW? SOMEONE PLS HELP ME!!! then today CHER good sia..brought a new show...Mr Fightin...act by wang renfu and sun xie zhi...that show damm nice..and renfu very handsome ....hahhaha....Cher...bring more okie? love u ready..hahhahahaha.....then got two assignments to hand up before Chinese New Year..ARGH..i hate it too....how?haaahaha.....okok...i am happy today..but there are somethin i don wish for it to turn out that way but somehow it did...didnt want to make it so awakard...haiz...headache ah..hahhah...
lookin at the outside of things....
knowin the inside of things...
never wanna know the reason...
never wanna know the answer...
but all came floatin up....
seein the truth..
knowin the things that lies beneath...
but still things are surfacin..
more things to think about..
more things to aviod...
so some things are better left unsaid...
hand tired....sleepy...Chunpei signin off----
oh yeah..today i am happy...somehow so..ahhha..cos whenever we had our gems we will go crazy..cos got that JOE guy ....we everytime disturb him and cher..haha...don know why also..me and jiayi always gang up to disturb the two of them..and i had curly fries in sch today also..so nice..!! YUMMY..hehhe..then went home early today..wahz..so unusual of me.hehehe..yupz..then i went runnin..wahz..runnin sehz..hahah..since how long i never run around my house compound...yar...then me and jiayi is super vexin about the elective module to choose...haiz...what to chose..somethin i like or soemthin more concernin to future? ARGH!! DAMM!! I REALLY GOT NO IDEA!!!HOW? SOMEONE PLS HELP ME!!! then today CHER good sia..brought a new show...Mr Fightin...act by wang renfu and sun xie zhi...that show damm nice..and renfu very handsome ....hahhaha....Cher...bring more okie? love u ready..hahhahahaha.....then got two assignments to hand up before Chinese New Year..ARGH..i hate it too....how?haaahaha.....okok...i am happy today..but there are somethin i don wish for it to turn out that way but somehow it did...didnt want to make it so awakard...haiz...headache ah..hahhah...
lookin at the outside of things....
knowin the inside of things...
never wanna know the reason...
never wanna know the answer...
but all came floatin up....
seein the truth..
knowin the things that lies beneath...
but still things are surfacin..
more things to think about..
more things to aviod...
so some things are better left unsaid...
hand tired....sleepy...Chunpei signin off----
Monday, January 17, 2005
caramel has alot to say..but she dont know where she should start..or how she should start...she got alot of feelings inside..but doesnt know how to express it out....and jus now while she was watchin TV..she heard this phrase goes like "Enjoy the process and ignore the outcome" somethin struck her mind..yar...why dont she jus enjoy the process and ignore the outcome...maybe she will be a happier person this way...why bother so much about the outcome..who knows the next day she die....*touchwood*..... but sometime enjoy the process is easy...but ignorin the outcome cant be that easy....isnt as easy as said...but maybe she will try doin it..and see whether she can enjoy the proceess and ignorin the outcome...recently emotions have been fillin in her once again....emotions that once died out..have become alive....but now..i think caramel see things in a different way...and somehow she is one who tolerate...but the anger will keep boilin..and she suppressed it and if she really cannot tolerate she will burst which i think can be scary...she wont want to see things turn like bad...and she jus wish for peace..why make it until everyone is unhappy...yar..but nowadays she isnt as happy as the period when she was in hongkong and after she came back...she is back to down.....but there are times when she still laughin like crazy..and she keep smilin...and sometime she is confusin over that pair of eyes...that pair of eyes can be so deciving..and untrustable...she was viewin her friendster testimonial jus now...irony...some frens really know her well..but they jus didnt stay....she realised that once frens are worlds apart...lost contact...is difficult to be as close as they were before..jus take caramel and one of her best fren as an example..JAS....since sec sch..the two of them were very close...going everywhere together..sharin everythin...be it happy or sad..be it tough or enjoyable...things never change for them..they shed tears together..they laugh and have fun together..but things started to chage when JAS went JC and she is still stuck in sec sch..although there is contact between them..but isnt as close...but they still become close frens agter that..but somehow they drifted apart again..and this time...it is for real...she find it hard to be as close again..cos caramel wont know when is it the next time for partin..she know partin and leavin is part and parcel of live....but is jus too much...yar...sayin is always easy..she always wanted to meet up with her sec sch best budd JAN...and her Work best frens eve and caren..but doin is always difficult..is either time doesnt allow..or thing cock up...but she misses them alot...haiz..frens come and go....WHO WILL STAY IN THE END? but now she got frens who are from sec sch though..some unexpected ones..hehehehheheh.....
Ole~Ole~Ole....POWER!!! SINGAPORE WON!!! i went to watch sia..the atmosphere was damm nice..superb SHIOK!!! wahz..RED LIONS REALLY ROAR!! hahahha....the whole crowd in kallang was damm uunited and damm cool...and indo fans only stand like 1/15 of the crowd..damm pathetic sia..haha..then the kallang wave we did was so damm nice..really better than NDP ...serious...and the match was awesome..now i understand the feelin of watchin SOCCER MATCHES LIVE!!! wow..now i wanna go old trafford and watch MANU match live..and Santiago Bernabau to watch REAL match live..power...the concentration u put in the game is better than watchin at home...and u roar when they score and cheer when they score...and heart skipped a beat when the opponent score...and jeered when they scored..hahha.was damm nice ah..hahha...but singapore fans are alittle too much..banners of 'indo welcome to hell'...damm bad ah...we keep cursin the indo fans andplayer..if i were the players..my morale really go down to the core man..but whats the situation like at indo home ground..maybe they are worse...but think about it..they cant win while playin at home ground..they expect to win playin AWAY?? hahhahaahah.....but the match damm nice ah...then we also saw hua and kenny on our way there...kenny very funny carryin the singapore flag..hahha..power...wahz..then on sat..spend a nightout man...is 15th..so as usual we met....4 guys and 1 girl..but this time round..we had more company...wei and joel join us...so the more the merrier...yupz..ehhe..then we went marina for steamboat...wahz..damm shiok..TOM YUM Soup...power...then we eat..then we had funn..and laugh..baolong crappy skills improve....hahhahha....he ah..forever...like to talk back at me..anyway not only him..i thin the whole gang..haha...yupz...really fun..and wei relly can click better with them than me man..and joel very funny..hahahha...yupz..then after that we went for a movie..but wei never go cos she had to go home and for joel..he is jus a small little boy..must understand..hahaha...so as well he went home..we watched meet the fockers...but it seems like only me laughin as usual..although it was the 2nd time i was watchin it...how come? bao wasnt laughin ...luo also i guess vin as well...but i think yeo must be laughin...hahha....anyway a new year..and we had a new night out...hahhaha...good one guys..hahhaha....next week...vin's plan..hehehehe...hope he cook ah..ahhahahahha....yeah yeah...then today i feel damm terrible unwell..feel like vommitin..but cant vommit out...i don know why..aiyo..feelin bad..haahha...damm shag also...but i played alittle soccer todya..so fun..hahah....yupz..hope tml will be a better day... :)
knowin the day cant get any better....
i try to enjoy the process...
tryin my best to fake out a smile..
but sorrow swells in my heart...
the reason is unknown...
the answer is unclear...
who can make me a happier person oncee again....
feelin sick...terrible..sleepy Chunpei--signin off...
Ole~Ole~Ole....POWER!!! SINGAPORE WON!!! i went to watch sia..the atmosphere was damm nice..superb SHIOK!!! wahz..RED LIONS REALLY ROAR!! hahahha....the whole crowd in kallang was damm uunited and damm cool...and indo fans only stand like 1/15 of the crowd..damm pathetic sia..haha..then the kallang wave we did was so damm nice..really better than NDP ...serious...and the match was awesome..now i understand the feelin of watchin SOCCER MATCHES LIVE!!! wow..now i wanna go old trafford and watch MANU match live..and Santiago Bernabau to watch REAL match live..power...the concentration u put in the game is better than watchin at home...and u roar when they score and cheer when they score...and heart skipped a beat when the opponent score...and jeered when they scored..hahha.was damm nice ah..hahha...but singapore fans are alittle too much..banners of 'indo welcome to hell'...damm bad ah...we keep cursin the indo fans andplayer..if i were the players..my morale really go down to the core man..but whats the situation like at indo home ground..maybe they are worse...but think about it..they cant win while playin at home ground..they expect to win playin AWAY?? hahhahaahah.....but the match damm nice ah...then we also saw hua and kenny on our way there...kenny very funny carryin the singapore flag..hahha..power...wahz..then on sat..spend a nightout man...is 15th..so as usual we met....4 guys and 1 girl..but this time round..we had more company...wei and joel join us...so the more the merrier...yupz..ehhe..then we went marina for steamboat...wahz..damm shiok..TOM YUM Soup...power...then we eat..then we had funn..and laugh..baolong crappy skills improve....hahhahha....he ah..forever...like to talk back at me..anyway not only him..i thin the whole gang..haha...yupz...really fun..and wei relly can click better with them than me man..and joel very funny..hahahha...yupz..then after that we went for a movie..but wei never go cos she had to go home and for joel..he is jus a small little boy..must understand..hahaha...so as well he went home..we watched meet the fockers...but it seems like only me laughin as usual..although it was the 2nd time i was watchin it...how come? bao wasnt laughin ...luo also i guess vin as well...but i think yeo must be laughin...hahha....anyway a new year..and we had a new night out...hahhaha...good one guys..hahhaha....next week...vin's plan..hehehehe...hope he cook ah..ahhahahahha....yeah yeah...then today i feel damm terrible unwell..feel like vommitin..but cant vommit out...i don know why..aiyo..feelin bad..haahha...damm shag also...but i played alittle soccer todya..so fun..hahah....yupz..hope tml will be a better day... :)
knowin the day cant get any better....
i try to enjoy the process...
tryin my best to fake out a smile..
but sorrow swells in my heart...
the reason is unknown...
the answer is unclear...
who can make me a happier person oncee again....
feelin sick...terrible..sleepy Chunpei--signin off...
Saturday, January 15, 2005
caramel is so unusual..bloggin in the mornin..cos she is awake early in the mornin..the funny thing is...when she is allowed to sleep in till very late...she wont...she will get up automatically..but when she isnt allowed to sleep in..she will dragged herslef out of bed...hahhah..she is so stupid..hahha...oh yeah..caramel had a pretty nice week...okie lahz..is very nice..but still alright...actually on wed night she had a terrible nightmare...some nightmare that she somehow doesnt wish to happen...the nightmare isnt those what erm...ghost those kind..but is something that she dreamt abuot that she thouogh is scary..really..she really doesnt wish for that to happen..things always get so complicated when the truth is out...she feels bad bout somethin..maybe she sholdnt tell anyone about it...but anyway is somehow this endin she wanted...jus that the method used isnt really that good....and the decision made by caramel somehow she succeed alittle...somehow she never really bother alot...somehow she isnt really excited...somehow she is alright with it..somehow she can be natural...somehow yeah..she did it....
there are alot of things in her mind she wants to say...about friends..about love..about sch work..about things that are happenin around every of us....like friends...friends do come and go....some are those u really want them to be happy...and would do anythin for them...those are ur best friends...you wouldnt want them to be sad..to be down...to be lost...u will be happy seein them happy...u will help them no matter what...this are ur best friends...but for me..i feel that best frens doesnt stay long..i got no ideea why...but for me...there isnt any best fren that stayed long in my life...or should i say i don even have a best fren till now....last time...i don really have a best fren...now..ya i do...i got quite a sum of best frens...sometimes i envy those frens that really don mind accompanyin...and already feel comfortable with each other...anythin under the sunn also can say...also can do togehter...i think that is totally awesome...i hope my best frens this time will stay....
talkin about love...Love is like caramel....taste so sweet and cant stop eatin it once u started....but once i thought love was sweet,lovin,happiness and accompanion..and things that are good...but as i grow older...and i realise alot of things..i realise love isnt as easy as i thought..love do not always have happy things happenin...love isnt as smooth and easy as i thought...it have many hard times...many things to go thru...i mean love have its pro and cons...but somehow i keep seein the cons...WHERE HAVE ALL THE PROS gone? hahhaha...but although love might be torturin..love might be sufferein...ppl are always still searchin for love dont they? they know it might be those tough times and might end up sufferein...they still WANT LOVE...LOVE IS POWERFUL ya? hahhaha....thats love...love is amazin...but it can also be a misery...lets hope all ppl who are in love be happy...and those who are out of love be in love soon..hahahhahah...
things that happen around us..jus like the tusnami...is saddin...incidednt jus happen like that..last year we got SARS,BALI BOMB,Nicoll highway collaspe,so many things that stuck us....we were sad,heartache...but we still welcome 2005...but who would have expect the tusnami? it jus happen so suddenly...it strike while ppl arent alert..it strike while ppl are enjoyin their holidays...it strike cruelessly...serious speakin...i cant imgaine if it will to strike SINGAPORE..i am serious...who would have expect that..i can imgaine my life ended if it struck singapore..i still got alot of things i haven learn..and haven do...and haven say...i really cant imgaine..i give my heart out to those victims that are affected by the tusnami...really...haiz...natural disaster...who would have expected that? nobody...........
wow..i blogged alot today..am i talkin all the rubbish ...haaaah...on thur they had the FO camp meetin..hahhahaha...the CHAIRPERSON is.....AH HUA..hahha..u go yonghua!!! hahhaa..then nette was the game sub comm...wei..as expected is the F&B comm.."WEI i want to eat long john" hahhaahah...then poor daniel is the game ic..he have to plan the whole thing...the games..everythin..so poor thing...haiyo...then i hope the rest of us will be GL...yar..then yesterday we had the runnnin...okie..it was still alright..my leg never realyl gave any problem..BCOS i applied alot of YOKO YOKO..haha..damm hot man..its burnin..hahhahha...then after that went P.S....we went gelare...Thanks brother..he treated me AGAIN!! next time shall be my time..but omg..their waffle ice cream dam nice!!really damm nice!!!but don have my caramel ice cream..if not yesterday i will be happier..hahhahaha....i loove caramel..caramel make me happy!!!hahahha...yeah yeah..then today i never work..only work on sun..so funny..then ya..i ate alot yesterday...really alot...gosh...hahhahah....
turnin back to myself...
but still feel alittle lost somewhere...
no idea what it is...
wantin to find out the reason...
but where should i start?
no idea...
maybe i should jus leave it and move on with life...
maybe findin out the reason
might in turn lead me to more misery..
i am fine now..
and will be better later...
so i will continue livin my life with happiness.....
refreshin...awake...Chunpei--signin off---
there are alot of things in her mind she wants to say...about friends..about love..about sch work..about things that are happenin around every of us....like friends...friends do come and go....some are those u really want them to be happy...and would do anythin for them...those are ur best friends...you wouldnt want them to be sad..to be down...to be lost...u will be happy seein them happy...u will help them no matter what...this are ur best friends...but for me..i feel that best frens doesnt stay long..i got no ideea why...but for me...there isnt any best fren that stayed long in my life...or should i say i don even have a best fren till now....last time...i don really have a best fren...now..ya i do...i got quite a sum of best frens...sometimes i envy those frens that really don mind accompanyin...and already feel comfortable with each other...anythin under the sunn also can say...also can do togehter...i think that is totally awesome...i hope my best frens this time will stay....
talkin about love...Love is like caramel....taste so sweet and cant stop eatin it once u started....but once i thought love was sweet,lovin,happiness and accompanion..and things that are good...but as i grow older...and i realise alot of things..i realise love isnt as easy as i thought..love do not always have happy things happenin...love isnt as smooth and easy as i thought...it have many hard times...many things to go thru...i mean love have its pro and cons...but somehow i keep seein the cons...WHERE HAVE ALL THE PROS gone? hahhaha...but although love might be torturin..love might be sufferein...ppl are always still searchin for love dont they? they know it might be those tough times and might end up sufferein...they still WANT LOVE...LOVE IS POWERFUL ya? hahhaha....thats love...love is amazin...but it can also be a misery...lets hope all ppl who are in love be happy...and those who are out of love be in love soon..hahahhahah...
things that happen around us..jus like the tusnami...is saddin...incidednt jus happen like that..last year we got SARS,BALI BOMB,Nicoll highway collaspe,so many things that stuck us....we were sad,heartache...but we still welcome 2005...but who would have expect the tusnami? it jus happen so suddenly...it strike while ppl arent alert..it strike while ppl are enjoyin their holidays...it strike cruelessly...serious speakin...i cant imgaine if it will to strike SINGAPORE..i am serious...who would have expect that..i can imgaine my life ended if it struck singapore..i still got alot of things i haven learn..and haven do...and haven say...i really cant imgaine..i give my heart out to those victims that are affected by the tusnami...really...haiz...natural disaster...who would have expected that? nobody...........
wow..i blogged alot today..am i talkin all the rubbish ...haaaah...on thur they had the FO camp meetin..hahhahaha...the CHAIRPERSON is.....AH HUA..hahha..u go yonghua!!! hahhaa..then nette was the game sub comm...wei..as expected is the F&B comm.."WEI i want to eat long john" hahhaahah...then poor daniel is the game ic..he have to plan the whole thing...the games..everythin..so poor thing...haiyo...then i hope the rest of us will be GL...yar..then yesterday we had the runnnin...okie..it was still alright..my leg never realyl gave any problem..BCOS i applied alot of YOKO YOKO..haha..damm hot man..its burnin..hahhahha...then after that went P.S....we went gelare...Thanks brother..he treated me AGAIN!! next time shall be my time..but omg..their waffle ice cream dam nice!!really damm nice!!!but don have my caramel ice cream..if not yesterday i will be happier..hahhahaha....i loove caramel..caramel make me happy!!!hahahha...yeah yeah..then today i never work..only work on sun..so funny..then ya..i ate alot yesterday...really alot...gosh...hahhahah....
turnin back to myself...
but still feel alittle lost somewhere...
no idea what it is...
wantin to find out the reason...
but where should i start?
no idea...
maybe i should jus leave it and move on with life...
maybe findin out the reason
might in turn lead me to more misery..
i am fine now..
and will be better later...
so i will continue livin my life with happiness.....
refreshin...awake...Chunpei--signin off---
Thursday, January 13, 2005
wooo..caramel...caramel is thinkin once again..caramel is thinkin wonderin and ponderin..what should she do with her thinkings? she decided what she should do and hope that she could do it..like what aida says...since she can do it..i also can do..like jus follow the NIKE slogan"JUST DO IT"...if i jus do it..maybe i can succeed..so i will jus do it..and stick with it..and i thik i am handlin it quite well..controllin myself quite okie...yar...so i jus have to keep it up and don talk so much...yar...so thinkin is over...and decision has made...and i will go with it..hurray...will i be be again? yar..i will..ehhehe....soon..i will...and i am glad that a few of my frens notice my abnormal...and asked me about it..it shows that i have frens that are concern about me..heheh..so yar..i am blessed..and i am fortunate...hehe...yar..i should think of the bright side of life...is like if i think abuot ......i feel so look down on myself..and i don wanna look down on myseldf...why should i make myself quite so low when in the first plave i arent right? yar...so i should jus forget and move on....yar...CHUNPEI u can do it one..hehee..yar...i did it last time..and i will do it again..i am protectin myself....and preventin myself from fallin again..so i should be aware and careful..heheh...and caramel. is recently havin spoilt legs..haha..her legs are spoilt..need to sese docttor...eehhehe...
i was very pissed..cos is like i tried bloggin no wed..but i cant..cos blogger has somethin wrong..cos on wed i don have class in the mornin cos my teacher injuried his leg..poor him..so i can sleep in late...and go sch late..but in the end i never erally sleep in lter...i woke uop quite early...yar..then got trainin..trainin was fine...wasnt very tirinin...and then today was okie.had drwain assignment..was alittle proud of my own work..ehheeeh...and yar..hope sheena will be fine soon..yar..hehe...
kokk...have to listen to lessson..and i scared bout sometihin will go spreadin around..hahhaha..okok..blog tml then..ehhe.. bye...i am myself again... :)
nkowin the truth...
bringin more misery...
knowin the feelings
brinign more unfulfiled hopes...
knowin everythin...
make me die!!!
happily....smilin Chunpei sigin off----
i was very pissed..cos is like i tried bloggin no wed..but i cant..cos blogger has somethin wrong..cos on wed i don have class in the mornin cos my teacher injuried his leg..poor him..so i can sleep in late...and go sch late..but in the end i never erally sleep in lter...i woke uop quite early...yar..then got trainin..trainin was fine...wasnt very tirinin...and then today was okie.had drwain assignment..was alittle proud of my own work..ehheeeh...and yar..hope sheena will be fine soon..yar..hehe...
kokk...have to listen to lessson..and i scared bout sometihin will go spreadin around..hahhaha..okok..blog tml then..ehhe.. bye...i am myself again... :)
nkowin the truth...
bringin more misery...
knowin the feelings
brinign more unfulfiled hopes...
knowin everythin...
make me die!!!
happily....smilin Chunpei sigin off----
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Diana degarmo-EMOTIONAL
Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
Laughing's always easy,
but sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional*fade*
You say I'm just impossible
Totally unpredictable
I'm just a girl get use to it
No big deal
You can't change me why would you try?
I'm no angel but I can make you smile
And that's the way it is
That's just the way I am
Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
Laughing's always easy but, sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional
Don't give up
I won't hurt you
Oh, sometimes I'm just a pain
And that's the way it is
That's just the way I am
That's when I need you
Laughing's always easy but, sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel oh yeah
That's when I need you
Sometimes I get emotional*fade*
That's just the way I am
Sometimes I feel like crying
Laying down and dying
That's when I need you
Laughing's always easy but sometimes I'm just scared you'll leave me
That's when I feel emotional
a very nice song..somehow..something..somehow..hahhaa..haiz...hahaha...
ooo..caramel is so not herself..what happen? she got no ideas about it..she jus know that she isnt herself..behavin strangely...keepin quiet when normally she is so talkative...not really laughin out from her heart...suddenly..sometimes she likes to be alone..she feels that what she do leads her to no direction..she has no idea where she is headin to..no idea what path will she end up with...she wants to know some answer..but the courage isnt there...jus like one of her fren told her before.."there must be somethin botherin u..if not u wont behave like that."and caramel believe so...there is something botherin her..but she knows part of it..but the other part of it..she has to search it find it and solve it..she has to..but she got no idea where to start...she feel crappy and shitty..knowing nothin about her own life..what is she excatly livin for? jus livin for...sleep,goin sch,hang out with frens eat and sleep again..what the hell kind of life is she leadin...Crappy...Sucky...maybe she hopes to do somethin big...but no idea what...but for now..maybe what she can really do is to enjoy her life...and one thing she hate about herself so so so much is that she thinks alot..damm alot...trust her..she can really think alot..sometimes she wonder whether are there any other people who thinks so much like her..she really thinks that she is always thinkin alot...really...sometimes she will pull herself to a high place and end up fallin..thats what sometime she deserve it...yar...and she really hope someone will come and brighten up her life..haiz..so much of thinkin end up only misery that falls upon her...what the hell is she tryin to do with her life..she got no idea...she loves her frens..and wants them to be happy..but she found out the irony thing is that...things always happen the opposite side..she don know is she givin too much as a fren..SEE...she is thinkin alot right? hahaa....anyway,weekends are endin...but caramel still have tons and tons of things to do...no rest for her..anyway,she had a tired week..it never get better... and some things kept her thinkin and thinkin throughout the week...things said keep goin thru in her mind..tryin to figure out what it means..tryin to think it straight..tryin not to be over sensitive..tryin to hide...tryin to stop herself..tryin hard...she knows she can do it..stopin anythin from happenin..although she yearn for it but she dont have the courage to make it happen..cos she knows the chances arent high..she is jus coward u all should say...but she doesnt blame herslef..thats jus her..and she realise this whole week she isnt happy..she isnt really smilin..she is back to her past...she is back to her past..really alittle back to her past...she doesnt know what she is thinkin and what she is doing..she jus hope that she could stop thinkin too much..whenever she is alone she thinks superb alot..haiz..she hope she could jus take out her brain and let her mind rest..hahahhaha..what logic is that? hahhaha..anyway,she jus hope everyone will be happy...yar..and there is soemthin she is afriad that will happen again...cos she wouldnt want to take back her words again................
wanted to blog on friday..but somehow there is some problem with blogspot..thats why i couldnt blog..haiz..nvm...cos on friday she got a COLLAGE assignment to hand up..and Her workpiece SUCKS..haiz..really sucks to the core...was disappointed in myself..and i chiong all night to finish up the collage and the report..oh ya...on thurs we had trainin..it wasnt really tiring..and i feel happy for marianna..heheheh..really...and me mj,brandon,wei and kenny went for dinner after that..yar..and thanks to kenny's crap.....i was talkin and smilin.....hahahha..he sure can talk alot...hahahha...yar...and on fri my best fren jiayi is workin....girl know u wil be tired..but all the way..hehe..JIAYOU..hahha..
then today we had daisy tan carnival...serious speakin..i must say that we played farely well todya.s.erious..i was quite surprised that i intercept balls..and defended some not bad move and balls..ehhee..yar..cos i wasnt myself today..i let out my tempered which was so unusual of me ah...yar..haiz...anyhway....i jus want to play more netball...HEHEHE...and tml got poly 50 runnin..ARGH..my leg is spoilt..hahhahah..
Hope ppl affected by the tsunami incident will stand up soon...will be fine soon..hope everythin will be the same again... -PEACE--
Tired of myself,
Tired for myself.
Feelin low..
feelin down...
who cares
who bothers...
i am left alone to care for myself..
but i can do nothin to help myself...'
but wait...............................................................
tired--exhausted--sleepy Chunpei --sigin off---
wanted to blog on friday..but somehow there is some problem with blogspot..thats why i couldnt blog..haiz..nvm...cos on friday she got a COLLAGE assignment to hand up..and Her workpiece SUCKS..haiz..really sucks to the core...was disappointed in myself..and i chiong all night to finish up the collage and the report..oh ya...on thurs we had trainin..it wasnt really tiring..and i feel happy for marianna..heheheh..really...and me mj,brandon,wei and kenny went for dinner after that..yar..and thanks to kenny's crap.....i was talkin and smilin.....hahahha..he sure can talk alot...hahahha...yar...and on fri my best fren jiayi is workin....girl know u wil be tired..but all the way..hehe..JIAYOU..hahha..
then today we had daisy tan carnival...serious speakin..i must say that we played farely well todya.s.erious..i was quite surprised that i intercept balls..and defended some not bad move and balls..ehhee..yar..cos i wasnt myself today..i let out my tempered which was so unusual of me ah...yar..haiz...anyhway....i jus want to play more netball...HEHEHE...and tml got poly 50 runnin..ARGH..my leg is spoilt..hahhahah..
Hope ppl affected by the tsunami incident will stand up soon...will be fine soon..hope everythin will be the same again... -PEACE--
Tired of myself,
Tired for myself.
Feelin low..
feelin down...
who cares
who bothers...
i am left alone to care for myself..
but i can do nothin to help myself...'
but wait...............................................................
tired--exhausted--sleepy Chunpei --sigin off---
Thursday, January 06, 2005
caramel is sick...but isnt feverish sick but is sick of things and stuffs...sick of work..sick of almost everythin..sick of puttin it effort..sick of gettin nothin in return..yar...so i don know...but she is jus painly tired...no idea what to do...so what she gona do next? no idea...she is always thinkin..really thinkin of those never will happen..but she can do nothin bout it..she cant stop her mind from thinkin..it jus thinkn like that...she hate herslef for that...she thinkgs too much..she jus hope that she wont think too much..she thought 2005 will be a good year..cos 2004 is definitely not a good year for her..but never did she know that 2005 is also not a good year..so now what she can do is to compare which year is the worst...2004? or 2005? we shall see...yar...she had a bad start in 2005 so the rest of 2005 wouldnt be any better..haiz..and she is exhausted..she thought feelings can be control..but now..she doesnt think so...feelings cant be control...heart jus go with the feelings..there isnt any way to stop it..any way to prevent it....everything jus need time!!! time to fade away..time to like..time to do everythin..time is everythin...yar....haiz...caramel is speachless....
Was PISSED!!PISSED yesterday..damm idiotic...is like what the helll...argh...i was nice to jus ask somthin nice and simple....and ahmad gave me a hell of shit..SHIT!!! what the hell he tryin to tell me!!! tryin to take revenge..thanks for that man...AHMAD u have always been so SHITTY...wahz..damm pissed off..what is that...IDIOT...gave me all the shitty things...wahz..i got no idea what he is up to..is like i am jus askin some question..is fine u don wanna answer..but spare me all those shit...fine..shall not talk to him..thanks for the lecture..but spare me man!!
and yesterday i chatted with sheena...guess is better that we talked online...ahahahha...so jus wanna ask her to pls stop what she ought to..hahha...yar..she can do it..pls do it...hehehh...
i am tired...
tired of walkin
tired of smilin
tired of everythin single little things..
i wish i could fly
fly freely in the air
nothin bothers me...
nothin worrys me...
jus me and myself...
me and i....
but i yearn for somethin happy things to happen..
some happen and i hope it will last..
for those that didnt happen..
i jus have to forget it...
tired--sleeply Chunpei...--signin off....
Was PISSED!!PISSED yesterday..damm idiotic...is like what the helll...argh...i was nice to jus ask somthin nice and simple....and ahmad gave me a hell of shit..SHIT!!! what the hell he tryin to tell me!!! tryin to take revenge..thanks for that man...AHMAD u have always been so SHITTY...wahz..damm pissed off..what is that...IDIOT...gave me all the shitty things...wahz..i got no idea what he is up to..is like i am jus askin some question..is fine u don wanna answer..but spare me all those shit...fine..shall not talk to him..thanks for the lecture..but spare me man!!
and yesterday i chatted with sheena...guess is better that we talked online...ahahahha...so jus wanna ask her to pls stop what she ought to..hahha...yar..she can do it..pls do it...hehehh...
i am tired...
tired of walkin
tired of smilin
tired of everythin single little things..
i wish i could fly
fly freely in the air
nothin bothers me...
nothin worrys me...
jus me and myself...
me and i....
but i yearn for somethin happy things to happen..
some happen and i hope it will last..
for those that didnt happen..
i jus have to forget it...
tired--sleeply Chunpei...--signin off....
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Monday, January 03, 2005
oh yeah...so many injuries today..wahz..the run was tough..and it was tough for me too...had alittle mood swing today though..yar..hmm..then yonghua sprain his ankle..and it seems pretty bad..small daniel injured his back..seems like he is gettin older..haha..no lahz..jus jokin..then kenny wasnt feelin very well though..yar..me too..i seems to have wobbly legs..like anytime it will break off...yar...hmm...went sch..was alittle moody..i think today the whole today was alittle moody...JEN ANG make it worse..hhahhah....
hey..anyway jus finish readin Sheena's blog..seems like we are communicating thru blog..cos it is definitely difficult for me to talk to her face to face..maybe i don dare to face her...yar...i might be the wrong one..i took her for granted..she always call me askin me how am i? whether i am alright today?askin me out...yar..she is always the one callin me...maybe is my fault..cos i don have the habit of callin my frens up askin "hey hows ur day? are u okie? wanna go out?" wahz..all this seldom come out from my mouth...maybe msg there might be...i know she is the one doin all the initiative...and i realise fad is also one ...is like she will also call me askin me how am i? yar..i might not call..cos i doesnt have the habit..maybe i took her for granted too...Yar..NOW I KNOW WHY U ARE FRENS WITH THEM AGAIN!!! they need u..they wanna u to be their frens..isnt that good...ppl wanna befriend u? can i say somethin from my heart also..."YOU!SHEENA has once been a friend that i am proud that i have" i love goin around tellin ppl..."Hey..This girl sheena...she is my friend...pretty right?" i really love goin around sayin that..maybe u dont know...yar..i am really proud havin u as my fren...but i don know why the sudden change in my..i am idiot okie..sorry...or mayhbe i don even know u enough..once thot i did...yar..u and ahmad..things got better for u guys cos u guys talk things out...thats good...havin one fren is better to have an enemy... i don know..i always feels that even i am not ur fren..it doesnt really make a difference...i believe what u always says too.."What comes around go around" so actually i am waitin this(what i did to you) to happen to me..cos i believe that this time will come..i mean i understand now that why u are frens with them back again..is jus that i was referrin to my feelings back last time..when u say u doesnt like them...that time when i didnt know the reason..ooo....she said i never make her happy?? i don nkow how to make u happy..u were in love ..out of love...in love and out of love...everytime u are out of love..i don know how i am suppose to console u...but i think ahmad had a better ways in dealin this..everytime u are in love..i am really happy for u..happy to see u happy once again..u think i feel good when u are sad..u think i feel good when i am unable to console u and PUT THE SMILE ON UR FACE...mayhbe i never try hard enough though.. i don hate u cos u are frens with them..in fact i don hate u at all..is jus a sudden feelin to walk away..IS ME..sorry to always PISSED you...but u think i am smilin her bloggin or when i readin ur blog?? u think i don care? Fine..yar..they always ask u out..COS THEY GOT NO FRIENDS!!(maybe that my point of view) is always so unlike of me callin ppl out..i never go callin F4 out...i never go callin fad out..i never go callin Ruzaini out...i am those waiting for calls...guess u jus don know me well enough...am i supposed to say that? i don know..what somehow i never assume u..but i jus hope u stop what u shouldnt be doin..thats my biggest concern..it isnt cool..STRESS isnt the reason..INFLUENCE is the big problem...STOP THAT !!!
i don know..i always end up arguin with her....maybe cos i still care alittle..of cos she still cares...if not she will go wont bother...but sch started for her..bet smokin for her will increase...so jus pls stop that...and always eat more..damm her..always don wanna eat..if not go toilet...oikie thats what i have to say...
hope tml will be a better day...haiz..don know..feelin moody today..wasnt happy...nothin happy..argh...argh..argh..hope tml will be a better day!!!!!pls...
The one i care..doesnt care...
The one i doesnt care...will always comin runnin to me...
The one i love...runs away...
The one i hate...became frens again...
The fren i treasure..dumps me...
The fren i don treasure...
Treasure me...
bet sheena must be feelin this way??
Tired--Moody--Chunpei --sigin off............ :(
hey..anyway jus finish readin Sheena's blog..seems like we are communicating thru blog..cos it is definitely difficult for me to talk to her face to face..maybe i don dare to face her...yar...i might be the wrong one..i took her for granted..she always call me askin me how am i? whether i am alright today?askin me out...yar..she is always the one callin me...maybe is my fault..cos i don have the habit of callin my frens up askin "hey hows ur day? are u okie? wanna go out?" wahz..all this seldom come out from my mouth...maybe msg there might be...i know she is the one doin all the initiative...and i realise fad is also one ...is like she will also call me askin me how am i? yar..i might not call..cos i doesnt have the habit..maybe i took her for granted too...Yar..NOW I KNOW WHY U ARE FRENS WITH THEM AGAIN!!! they need u..they wanna u to be their frens..isnt that good...ppl wanna befriend u? can i say somethin from my heart also..."YOU!SHEENA has once been a friend that i am proud that i have" i love goin around tellin ppl..."Hey..This girl sheena...she is my friend...pretty right?" i really love goin around sayin that..maybe u dont know...yar..i am really proud havin u as my fren...but i don know why the sudden change in my..i am idiot okie..sorry...or mayhbe i don even know u enough..once thot i did...yar..u and ahmad..things got better for u guys cos u guys talk things out...thats good...havin one fren is better to have an enemy... i don know..i always feels that even i am not ur fren..it doesnt really make a difference...i believe what u always says too.."What comes around go around" so actually i am waitin this(what i did to you) to happen to me..cos i believe that this time will come..i mean i understand now that why u are frens with them back again..is jus that i was referrin to my feelings back last time..when u say u doesnt like them...that time when i didnt know the reason..ooo....she said i never make her happy?? i don nkow how to make u happy..u were in love ..out of love...in love and out of love...everytime u are out of love..i don know how i am suppose to console u...but i think ahmad had a better ways in dealin this..everytime u are in love..i am really happy for u..happy to see u happy once again..u think i feel good when u are sad..u think i feel good when i am unable to console u and PUT THE SMILE ON UR FACE...mayhbe i never try hard enough though.. i don hate u cos u are frens with them..in fact i don hate u at all..is jus a sudden feelin to walk away..IS ME..sorry to always PISSED you...but u think i am smilin her bloggin or when i readin ur blog?? u think i don care? Fine..yar..they always ask u out..COS THEY GOT NO FRIENDS!!(maybe that my point of view) is always so unlike of me callin ppl out..i never go callin F4 out...i never go callin fad out..i never go callin Ruzaini out...i am those waiting for calls...guess u jus don know me well enough...am i supposed to say that? i don know..what somehow i never assume u..but i jus hope u stop what u shouldnt be doin..thats my biggest concern..it isnt cool..STRESS isnt the reason..INFLUENCE is the big problem...STOP THAT !!!
i don know..i always end up arguin with her....maybe cos i still care alittle..of cos she still cares...if not she will go wont bother...but sch started for her..bet smokin for her will increase...so jus pls stop that...and always eat more..damm her..always don wanna eat..if not go toilet...oikie thats what i have to say...
hope tml will be a better day...haiz..don know..feelin moody today..wasnt happy...nothin happy..argh...argh..argh..hope tml will be a better day!!!!!pls...
The one i care..doesnt care...
The one i doesnt care...will always comin runnin to me...
The one i love...runs away...
The one i hate...became frens again...
The fren i treasure..dumps me...
The fren i don treasure...
Treasure me...
bet sheena must be feelin this way??
Tired--Moody--Chunpei --sigin off............ :(
Sunday, January 02, 2005
oh yeah..i changed my blogskin...cos i feel a new year..mayhbe i should change my blogskin..but for me i still prefer the previous one..how bout u guys? give me some comments bout thie blogskin k..hehehe.. :).....
haiz..i was never wrong..whenever i bump into sheena's blog..i will end up havin to write about how i feel...she mention that "C.p i am gona say somethin from my heart..u didnt like how i am close with abd..cos i used to hate him..you didnt like how i close with chal and nad..i became frens with them for a reason w/o u askin me for it..you left like that..and now..u shuold be happy abd is doin the same thing..i will tell u when nad or chal do the same thing..one by one..go leave...go..i become frens for them for a reason..cos they need me..and i am there as a fren for them..and they do this to me?? u guys give me this shit??ARGHHHH..put that in mind..C.P"..
okie..this is what she wrote..after readin it..first i wanna say..I WASNT FEELIN HAPPY WHEN AHMAD IS DOIN THE SAME THING!!! u arent me...how u know what i feel? what makes u so sure that i will be happy seein ahmad doin the same thing?? anyway up to u to believe..yar..thats all what ruzaini told u..cos i told him..thats excatly how i feel...is bcos of u ...my hate for ahmad grew more...bcos of u..i dont like nad.thats simple..and here i am..dislikin them..yet u became frens with them back..u know how i feel? like a stupid shit...yhar!!okie..u have ur reasons for doin things..i see that..and i know that now....but u still have one fren left..i bet ruzaini wont go runnin away...and ibelieve ahmad wont go runni away as well..is jus a state of change..yar..indeed u change alot...more than me?i don know...goin wild. wonderin what u gonna do with ur life? was seriously hate it and angry when i learn bout ur smokin...WHAT THE HELL U TRYIN TO RUIN UR LIFE!! each and every one of u..i got no idea what u guys tryin to do one by one...ahmad started..i think chal and nad had...then now u..so next ruzaini? i guess so...or he had ready...didnt know things will changed so badly..but sometime i did wonder what things will be like if i never walked away? i don know...no idea at all...but i guess..u will stay away from smokin?i don kow..jus hope that things will go fine..and i ARENT HAPPY IF AHMAD IS REALLY DOIN THE SAME THING!!! don assume things when u arent me...didnt know things will turn out so bad..
watched the tusnami thingy jus now when i were at home..this minister was sayin.."We were lucky that sumatra block us from this natural disaster..." then i am like thinkin..Yar ...True enough..they block us preventin us from meetin this natural disaster..cos i couldnt imagine things and life be if that really strike us..really cant imagine..really....THANKS...But felt so sorry..and sad...tears came rollin down when i see the bodies and waves...how could a calm and friendly and beautiful waves become a fierce,fast-comin waves....imgaine how breatheless u can get when u are strugglin? imgaine bein left alone searchin for ur loved-ones..OMG!!! what am i thinkin? i hate it...is so near us..and i fear things might happen...haiz..lets hope the death percentage dont increase..lets hope harmony and peace will regain again..lets pray for the innocents..and wish for the best in a new year!!
things come and go....people passed and stayed...feelings come and stay...saddness stay intact..happiness is jus a moment of seconds...hope peace is everywhere!!
eyes becomin smaller caramel Chunpei -- signin off--
haiz..i was never wrong..whenever i bump into sheena's blog..i will end up havin to write about how i feel...she mention that "C.p i am gona say somethin from my heart..u didnt like how i am close with abd..cos i used to hate him..you didnt like how i close with chal and nad..i became frens with them for a reason w/o u askin me for it..you left like that..and now..u shuold be happy abd is doin the same thing..i will tell u when nad or chal do the same thing..one by one..go leave...go..i become frens for them for a reason..cos they need me..and i am there as a fren for them..and they do this to me?? u guys give me this shit??ARGHHHH..put that in mind..C.P"..
okie..this is what she wrote..after readin it..first i wanna say..I WASNT FEELIN HAPPY WHEN AHMAD IS DOIN THE SAME THING!!! u arent me...how u know what i feel? what makes u so sure that i will be happy seein ahmad doin the same thing?? anyway up to u to believe..yar..thats all what ruzaini told u..cos i told him..thats excatly how i feel...is bcos of u ...my hate for ahmad grew more...bcos of u..i dont like nad.thats simple..and here i am..dislikin them..yet u became frens with them back..u know how i feel? like a stupid shit...yhar!!okie..u have ur reasons for doin things..i see that..and i know that now....but u still have one fren left..i bet ruzaini wont go runnin away...and ibelieve ahmad wont go runni away as well..is jus a state of change..yar..indeed u change alot...more than me?i don know...goin wild. wonderin what u gonna do with ur life? was seriously hate it and angry when i learn bout ur smokin...WHAT THE HELL U TRYIN TO RUIN UR LIFE!! each and every one of u..i got no idea what u guys tryin to do one by one...ahmad started..i think chal and nad had...then now u..so next ruzaini? i guess so...or he had ready...didnt know things will changed so badly..but sometime i did wonder what things will be like if i never walked away? i don know...no idea at all...but i guess..u will stay away from smokin?i don kow..jus hope that things will go fine..and i ARENT HAPPY IF AHMAD IS REALLY DOIN THE SAME THING!!! don assume things when u arent me...didnt know things will turn out so bad..
watched the tusnami thingy jus now when i were at home..this minister was sayin.."We were lucky that sumatra block us from this natural disaster..." then i am like thinkin..Yar ...True enough..they block us preventin us from meetin this natural disaster..cos i couldnt imagine things and life be if that really strike us..really cant imagine..really....THANKS...But felt so sorry..and sad...tears came rollin down when i see the bodies and waves...how could a calm and friendly and beautiful waves become a fierce,fast-comin waves....imgaine how breatheless u can get when u are strugglin? imgaine bein left alone searchin for ur loved-ones..OMG!!! what am i thinkin? i hate it...is so near us..and i fear things might happen...haiz..lets hope the death percentage dont increase..lets hope harmony and peace will regain again..lets pray for the innocents..and wish for the best in a new year!!
things come and go....people passed and stayed...feelings come and stay...saddness stay intact..happiness is jus a moment of seconds...hope peace is everywhere!!
eyes becomin smaller caramel Chunpei -- signin off--
HAPPY 2005!!Welcome To 2005!!!!
wow..another year have passed...what is this 2005 year gona be? i got no ideas..but i seriously hope that it will be so much better than 2004..2004 SUCKS!! anyway....i already had a bad start for 2005...so thats explains why the remainin 2005 will be this bad as well....
Town was crazy..crazily high..ppl walkin around..SPRAYING!! but i was in a perfectly safe zone..i was dinin at a new cafe at cine..and we were sittin comfortably...and eatin..drinkin...hehe..and then we were waitin for the count down...3..2..1..HAPPY NEW YEAR..we toast with apple juice..provided by the cafe...YEAH..happy new year...but i werent very happy..too many things have happended...things that arent good...don know..thought it should be a happy occasion..guess i lost my happy self again...seems weird..but it is...then after that we went slackin..walked all the way from orchard to esplande..wahz...everywhere is crowded with ppl..there is a party at padang...but at that point of time..there is only one thing in my mind.............hahha..yupz..then after that...sorry to say..but i bought a drink..alcohol drink..hooch..blackcurrant..cos they only left this..it was nicee...yupz..then we drink while we walked..then after that sat down at merlion park there..near the pier..then i was feelin damm hot..face superb red...later i post the pictures..hahhahaha...i wasnt drunk but feelin hot..then after that took NR6 home..heheh...
but the whole things jus doesnt feel happy..i got no idea why..but i didnt feel happy deep from my heart...yar thats was what i felt..haiz...
i don know what to blog anymore...
Love is torturin..but why ppl keep pursuin it..cos humans have feelings...It is torturin..but it certainly has its sweet,lovin and nice part...Hopin for love..but saw how tough love could be...Seein how love changed a person..knowin how love can be sp power and amazin!! understand the meanin of love...knowin why love is neccesary...Feelings are jus there when it will be..if it is urs then it will definitely be!!
things come runnin to you when u decided to run away from it....
things that u are consistently pursuin it...will tends to ruun away from you...
same logic as taxi..the more u want..the more u wont have it...the moment when u arent takin taxi..the more taxi is available for you...
thats explains why men are like taxi..when u want none..all come runnin to you..when u want it..they all avoid u like hell....
jus hope everyone spent their new year eve and new year happily..don be like me!! yupz... happy new year..hope 2005 will be a better year for everyone..
and my concern for tusnami accident...it is definintely somethin sad................hope there will be peace..let 2005 be a good,safe and posper year!!
sighin Chunpei--signin off----
wow..another year have passed...what is this 2005 year gona be? i got no ideas..but i seriously hope that it will be so much better than 2004..2004 SUCKS!! anyway....i already had a bad start for 2005...so thats explains why the remainin 2005 will be this bad as well....
Town was crazy..crazily high..ppl walkin around..SPRAYING!! but i was in a perfectly safe zone..i was dinin at a new cafe at cine..and we were sittin comfortably...and eatin..drinkin...hehe..and then we were waitin for the count down...3..2..1..HAPPY NEW YEAR..we toast with apple juice..provided by the cafe...YEAH..happy new year...but i werent very happy..too many things have happended...things that arent good...don know..thought it should be a happy occasion..guess i lost my happy self again...seems weird..but it is...then after that we went slackin..walked all the way from orchard to esplande..wahz...everywhere is crowded with ppl..there is a party at padang...but at that point of time..there is only one thing in my mind.............hahha..yupz..then after that...sorry to say..but i bought a drink..alcohol drink..hooch..blackcurrant..cos they only left this..it was nicee...yupz..then we drink while we walked..then after that sat down at merlion park there..near the pier..then i was feelin damm hot..face superb red...later i post the pictures..hahhahaha...i wasnt drunk but feelin hot..then after that took NR6 home..heheh...
but the whole things jus doesnt feel happy..i got no idea why..but i didnt feel happy deep from my heart...yar thats was what i felt..haiz...
i don know what to blog anymore...
Love is torturin..but why ppl keep pursuin it..cos humans have feelings...It is torturin..but it certainly has its sweet,lovin and nice part...Hopin for love..but saw how tough love could be...Seein how love changed a person..knowin how love can be sp power and amazin!! understand the meanin of love...knowin why love is neccesary...Feelings are jus there when it will be..if it is urs then it will definitely be!!
things come runnin to you when u decided to run away from it....
things that u are consistently pursuin it...will tends to ruun away from you...
same logic as taxi..the more u want..the more u wont have it...the moment when u arent takin taxi..the more taxi is available for you...
thats explains why men are like taxi..when u want none..all come runnin to you..when u want it..they all avoid u like hell....
jus hope everyone spent their new year eve and new year happily..don be like me!! yupz... happy new year..hope 2005 will be a better year for everyone..
and my concern for tusnami accident...it is definintely somethin sad................hope there will be peace..let 2005 be a good,safe and posper year!!
sighin Chunpei--signin off----
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