hi..mornin...i don know why i am up so early..cos i supposed to be in bed now...cos i slept very late last night...i feel a heart pain when i woke up..i don know why...but somehow i feel so emo the moment i wake up...cos i had a dream last night...a dream of .......i am not thinkin about .....or neither am i wonderin about .....but why am i dreamin about ........oh my god..i feel like that is my only dream last night....is all feel with......and my frens..somethin that is so unbelievable.....somethin jus so hard to explain...is like when i woke up the dream is still inside my mind..the dream is like still goin on....and this mornin i went thru some things i wrote last time..wahz..the pain i felt last time is really terrible...somehow is like i can cry any moment...there are letters and letters that i wrote out of anger..out of saddness...and never will i imagine i could write those out..ahha..so fuunny..thats why sometime u have to write down somethin..and after a long time u read it..u will go like "am i really the one who write it?"i think i was once in a pool of tears and a mood of saddness..a world of unfaced reality...ask me if i have the chance to change somethin what will it be? the answer will be -->change every single things that happen to my fren...and stop anythin from happenin to my frens as well.....i realise i only know how to talk but no actions at all......the dream last night is what i never thought i will dream....so scary so funny..so shockin...izzit hintin me somethin?wooo....hahhaha.....i think i am more crazy over lookin at guys..hahah..i am CRAZY!! haiz..i remember that there is a period of time when i can cry at small little things...small little memories...and somethin that supposed to be happy i also can cry..how fragile i am?but...time really fades memories away.........but it took me long........not only time..but ppl around u...anyway,i feelin like updatin cos i have somethin to say..and i doubt tonight i have the time cos i will be workin later..then the next day i work mornin..so have to sleep early so that i can wake up early....later don know who workin...but i know fad surely workin....

haiz..nothin for today...never see my cool guy in school..and never see someone...then my fren say i crazy cos i tell them"wahz..today i wear so nice to school never see my cool guy sia"..they say"siao ah u"hahah...they i jus laugh ah...they keep askin me to get his no..but no lahz..he is jus someone that i can keep a lookout for in school...so it make school more interestin rather than borin...now in school i have this two good fren ...is nicec bein with them cos we can joke anythin under the sun..hahah...we gossip..we joke..we talk..but we are also serious in work..ahhaha..haha....but so sad..never see cool guy sia..haiz..never make my day...it will be better if i met someone else too..but no...but nvm..i met farihan...finally...saw farihan..he was at my block..quite shocked to see him..haha..then now left dibah i haven meet in school...haha...poor him workin tonight..haha..haha...forget to ask him what cca he joined!haha...then finally SP is doin some funn event..STELLA is comin to SP for a small music concert..and i want to GO!! and i hope manfred can help me get the tickets..please manfred..hahaha...ahhaha...then today my fren in school..good sia..she really super super duper Jerry's Fan...she gave me alot of poster and stuffs..and u let me feel the feelin of my past while i am still crazy over them..miss that time...when i occupied by them...in my mind is all them...so i was happy at that time...haha...then now i am once again goin alittle crazy over them..hehe..ANYWAY,Jerry's album comin out..Finally,after so long..miss him alittle..hahaha...thanks tingting..ahha..then i jus finished watchin the Room in my heart..9pm show in channel 8...so sad...so fraustratin..so idiot...i think kaixin love jiankang..and vice versa...but for some reason they somehow cant be together...so sad...is like i jus don understand why when two ppl like each other cant be together but somehow must forced urself to be with someone u don really like...arent u torturin urself?maybe this is love...this is emotion...this is feelin..anyway..love sucks..so do emotion..and feelings..they all sucks...too bad..human cant live without it...am i correct?but it is so heart pain to see both ppl love each other but one arent selfish to go for it..noe i unnderstand the meanin of "Love is selfish..if u chose to be kind u will be the one to sufffer"wow...seems like i am some love expert when i never been into one...maybe i think alot too...hahah...haiz..sometimes we really have to take things easy and accept the fact....sometimes i also wonder whether i am livin in a world of reality or in my dreams??everythin seems so fake...i cant believe i am in what so ever STuPid POLY....cos sec sch days jus seems like yesterday....see..i am gettin emo again...but jus feel like i jus joke with ahmad yesterday,talk with nad durin F&N lesson,havin janice sittin beside me and stay in class durin recess...talkin with vishal,ena n ruzaini durin maths lesson..and havin MR GAN tellin us"study lahz..no much time left"everythin jus seems like yesterday..........wearin my brown uniform..so proud of it..ahha...hahha...and wearin my nice school shoes...wearin my army bag..havin my silver shinin badge...tiein my hair...walkin to school..meet benny and ruzaini in bus...reach sch...standin in the parade ground...singin MARI KITA...sittin down for readin..walkin back to class..havin lesson..walkin pass 5A class for science practical...havin mother tongue lesson..havin english lesson..havin mr bernard PE lesson...OHMY...why am i missin sec sch more than ever now...hey guys!!really miss the FUN!!!take care ppl....stop here..if not i am goin to write non-stop...haha...

my cool guy!!!

Today happy happy happy..hahah..okie lahz..also not quite happy...jus a normal day in school again..then today talk to hakimi..he seem so tired...then saw najibah..then saw manfred!!hahhaha..so funny..so much wish that i will be in my old first class..haiz...hahhaha...much more fun than what in am in now..then have lesson...okie lahz..then eat until very full sia..then went toilet again...haiz..stomach got some problem...haha...then after that i saw so funny sia...i was at level one then i was tellin my fren that "eh..today never see my mr cool guy" then was talkin then my mr cool guy walked passed the second level at the other block then my fren say "eh..the guy": then i see...then i am like huh really?doesnt seem like him lehz..cos today he changed his hairstyle..today's hairstyle is nicer...but don know why i am like quite attracted to him cos he neither have the cute and charmin smile...don know..maybe he is jus cool..haha...then after that i went crazy...kep laughin and laughin..then my fren showed me Jerry's photo...then i went more wild...haha...then i doubt i have time to update my blog tonight cos got netball trainin then after that i reach home i will have to watch The O.C..then go sleep....cos surely very tired...haiz..then after that surely go sleep...haha..okok...havin storyboardin lesson now...have to anaylse my ideas..and make it better again...alot of ppl say mine idea is difficult to shot...i also think likewise...haha...hope i can make it..hehe...good luck to me then..okok...hope later trainin wont be so tough scared my stomach cannot take it...and i am really shag and tired...haiz...haiz..haiz...sian sian sian sian ...take care ena..take care yana..take care ruzaini..take care effa..take care faisal..take care all my fellow friends...hahah..see how borin i am??????????hahah.....hahaha....

terrible stomach

Wahz....stupid sia..sincec yesterady had a terrible ...super terrible stomach..even until today in the mornin when i go school also got..then while do my java half way i went to the toilet man...cos really cannot tanhan..stomach super pain..then after that...actually today i had a short day in school...then durin our break was borin..cos we had an early break so couldnt clash with other ppl...but saw hakimi and iqbal...thot they havin break too..but i think they are too hungry and went to the canteen to grab somethin to eat..ahhahahah....then oh ya..yesterday i saw najibah after school...and i find she is really very okie..i think i had wrong impression of her in the first place..maybe is like the person that gives u not the good impression will be the one that in the end u will find that they are okie...bcos they will give u a bad impression cos they arent actin infront of you..is their true self...so is fine....and i had a short talk with her...like ask her about her floorball..cos she kinda very close with the floorball girls...haha...hmm..then today after lesson i went town alone to buy watch..bcos i was super sad..yesterday my watch commit suicide...it jump from fourth floor to the ground..i was damm sad..cos i love that watch alot..and now i feel so funny without a watch..i don dare to wear the EX watch to sch....cos i scared i bang the watch agasint somethin..so i went to get a cheap and nicee one...and actually wanted to get back the same one but i think like nothin special to get the same one so i get another deesign one...but if i have the money i wil buy back the same one again..but this shows that even if i have feelin for that somethin i might not get it back but will get it back when time comes..i thought i was a very sentimental person...but i am also someone to look for somethin new..hehe...and i bought two zara plain shirt...then nothin to do at home...today must have an early night cos tml is a long day plus got trainin...and somemore tml trainin wil be tougher than monday one..haiz..scary..hahaa..but so fast like a week gonna passed by..haha...and today i saw the COOl guy in sch.and now i can confirm he is a IT student cos he was in the lecture hall..and today he is damm cool...wearin the whole suit of type 1....type 1 jacket and type 1 jeans..COOL~...hahha....*listenini to ->end of road - boyz 2 men*........

normal day in school...terrible stomach today

haiz...today is jus a normal school day....have maths lesson...and it was pretty okie...nothin much...then every week this day..tuesday i will like see farihan over at the other block but today i never cos i don have my break...and i really haven see farihan and dibah in school...even honeysa is like at the other end i saw her in my school  before..but this two..haiyo..never met them before...haha...okie nvm..then today i saw that COOL guy again sia..then at first he intend to take the lift then when he saw me and my frens he was like also walkin down the stairs with us...mayhbe the lift is too long or maybe he want to see my fren...hehe...but he got COOL hairstyle ah...hahaha....i am wonderin whether he is an engineerin student or an IT student...cos i saw him at IT block goin to class...then i saw him at engineerin block today too..don know lahz..then after that have TWO long hours break...then at first thought maybe can go library with hakimi and his frens..but i already got this feelin that today he's not havin that two break..and jus as i expected ....is true..his two hour break is alternate weeks....so nvm..i went to the library alone..and read newspaper..then nearly cried on the article on the baby and the air-stewardess....so poor thing sia..never expected what will happen to you next....haiz...then lucky DAWN they all finish their tutorial early...then went to meet them...then have my java lesson..then okie ah...then never see hakimi they all in other class eh...then after lesson went to canteen to grab a drink and saw hakimi they all...funny sia..don understand why some ppl like to eat before they go hoome?school food nicee ah?? or cheap?? haha..funny...then went to meet ena in tamp...then saw this two cutee guyys....then we keep bumpin into them...then we intend to play pool but in the end never and went to play arcade which i like ages haven been there..then i play those fight fight games...hand tired sia..haha..then after that went home..then took 293..then stomach super pain ...want to ...... then went i reach home immediately i rush to the toilet.....feel much more better..but then now stomach still feel funny..like don know how to say ah..jus not feel right...like anytime can vomit sia...i forgot what i actually want to say but i know somethings are kept in my heart.........and watch the encore telecast of LIGHTYEARS...inside..Kim was the freshie..then she said somethin like this "poly was so much different..unlike in sec sch..everyone seems to know each other..everywhere u go we will like greet each other with a smiles"..i totally superly agree with what she said...is like ok ah..can understand that poly carries alot of students much more than sec school..but we are separeted into A and B class..then B class is like divided into 4 classes...i merely only know some other ppl from the other 2 B class...and each class like only carries the most 18 ppl...we don even really smile when we see each other....haiz..so pathetic eh...how i wish i have more time to spend in sec sch....sometimes i think that maybe i had too much fun in sec sch that it made me miss it so much now...haiz..i really don know lahz..and i love the song *Have you ever- Brandy* i can answer all the question in that song man...and sometime i think back...i might neglect somebody in the past that i don realise he ever exist..i am too much blinded by someone else...maybe things might be better if somethin never happen....or should i say..this is all FATE!Saw TBL and KK in sch today...TBL is mixin with kinda of malay guys..hahaha...haiz...*Look What You've Done-Jet* i miss everyone...i miss u all..really.....okie..think i gona stop here...i know before i want to write my blog i got somethin else to write but forget..haiz...okok..need to print some sch stuffs out...bye....

TIRED ...AND PISSED AGAIN!!!!

have been pissed by things recently...cos i wanted to finish my assignment tonight cos the deadline is tml..then i intend to do it durin the time in between after lesson and trainin but sch library com cannot watch the ad..then nvm i thought go home and do ah..then i try..but cannot open the file..SHIT sia...haiz...then how am i supposed to hand in??tell me...tell me..tell me...hahha...then i think i really only feel happy when i am havin my netball trainings..although is tough but is fun too..feel like bein back to the old times is jus that different fellow teammates...but luckily eveyone gets along very well..hehe...and today i thought to go to sports complex earlier and see the soccer boys train..but i go there early they haven start their trainin....and today we start our trainin first...then after that they start..then their trainin like super relax sia..today they like train for 2 hour only sia..ruun and ruun and run only...never see them play lehz..then our trainin..we also run and runn and run...but seriously their physical not as heavy as DUNMAN one...Dunman is really the BEST man!! Dunman netball ROCKS!!!!hehe..miss u guys..miss the trainin time although we always grumble...miss the funn..then i think my class girls really nothin better to do sia..cos they after school don want to go home go to the multi purpose field and see guys play soccer..WHAT THE!!! jus cant understand them..so much wish that i am in 1b/22 rather than this shity damm F**Kin class...so lame and stupid sia..haiz..then i think i can mix better with the 1B/22 and 1B/21 girls rather than my damm shitty class..then today..the Rap photostap some notes...then she gave me first..I AM THE FIRST TO GET THE PAPER durin lesson..then after lesson she anounnce that 1B/23 stay back...then i am like wonderin FOR WHAT?? then i ask her nicely ah..then she say "oh...u got ur papers ready right..then u no need to stay back ready..can go"..i am like WHATEVER..what is this man? give me the paper first and ask me to go..AM I NOT IN 1B/23???Hey..what u think u all are...all younger than me...SHUT YOUR DAMM .............really cannot stand them ready...what do they really think they are? so pretty babes when they arent at all!!!i am not sayin i am..but they are neither!!!mention them only i burnin sia!!!haiz..then now cannot do my assisgment...haiz..how?this one hand in tml..audio one hand in next fri..then the video one on 17/8....how sia?? tell me??super stress!!!!haiz..miss my sec sch life..really damm miss man....since cannot do my work..goin to sleep ready...ciaoz...bye..nitezz...clamin myself down..*Have u ever-Brandy*

now doin nothin in school..waitin for netball to start

Yeah..i can use orange back again..cos i change my blogskin again...haiz..now doin nothin in school..thot of finishin my assignment in school but the QUICK TIME player not workin...then cannot..waitin for my netball to start..and i seriously hope it don rain..i hate playin netball when it rains..and today i never go for my Character Development lecture...cos i could pull myself up...and continue sleepin..then when i got audio lesson..weile told me that i got community service this sat ...WHAT THE!! if i never talk to him i will never know..see how bad my situation in class is? see how i "get" along with my classmates...stupid idiots...they discuss again to wear MINI shorts to school...how lame how lame..OH my..OH my...haiz..don know them lahz..then this amanda pissed me off..we had audio lesson and teacher ask us to go around to listen to others one..then i am not at my desk..then amanda came and ask"which one is chunpei's computer?which one?"like damm idiot...wahts so excited about my work? and how rude can she be? she never even ask me...wahz..if i am not worried about my stuffs and wonder alot about that i would have told her off man...stupid...haiz...don know lahz...sian..okok..stop here..continue at night...cos i have yet to finish my assignment...okie..bye..

Have you ever??

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything up to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for words to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start
Have you ever loved somebody so muchI
t's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all your life
You'd do just about anything to look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
What do I gotta do to get you in my arms baby
What do I gotta say to get to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world'Cuz baby I can't sleep
Have you ever loved somebody so much
It's makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever
(Repeat till fade)

 

nice lyrics and songs eh...so emo....so FEeelinnng....sad also....

haiz..

Hey,i change my blogskin but the words are remain unseen cos the background is orange..anyway,why am i doin here so late...cos i have to finish my school assignments...DAMM IT!!sian sia...haiz..then jus now had a shity work day..DAMM IT!!haiz..ppl come non-stop....i talk non-stop..not enuff staffs..only me,jeremy,khairi and liza...what sia..so little staffs and so many ppl..don understand why there are so many ppl ...so tired sia...stand so long talk so long...i didnt even get any rest...headache...dizzy..anyway,hope to get sick also...then i think i did mention about yesterday stuffs...haiz..see how blur i am..only yesterday things and i cant remember...the more i know what LIFE is..the more i find it is harder for me to survive..you wont know who is true to you and who is backstabbin u at ur back...ppl are dangerous creature...now,i really find it hard to believe ppl whom i jus get to know...really difficult...i don know why..but i have alot of things in my mind that i need to get it sort out...too many things...once i thought i knew what life is..but then again i was wronged...see...why do i keep makin wrong judgement bout ppl and about myself? anyway,if i cannot make the right judgement for myself what right have i to make the correct judgement about others...and school stuffs are botherin me..work stuffs are botherin me..some stupid sch frens are botherin...relation in life are botherin..why cant i have a simple life? last time, i was this HAPPY-GO-LUCKY girl...why cant i be that now? why is it that i find it so difficult to communicate to ppl now? then are so many questions in my head that i have no answer...i am gettin scared of ppl now..."A broken trust is hard to heal,a broken heart is hard to recover"why the more i discover things the more life gets worse...i dont know who i am but i really want to know who i am...WHO AM I??Have i becomin worse and bad? cos i have been wantin to start fight with my sch girls and have been talkin behind ppl's back??how can i make my life back to normal..the SEC 5B - C.P..ah pei?? how can i? how do i?and school isnt gettin better...tons and tons of work and have no idea what it is about..i really scared that i will drop-out...really afraid about that..cos i got no discipline to do thigns myself...i don know...really alot of things in my mind...can i erase some memories??haiz..i have learned some lessons in somethin ..but the more i learn the higher the level gets...haiz...don know ah..so tired..goin to sleep soon..somemore tml school start at nine..and after that got trainin and is PHYSICAL!!!!want to train stamina and get ready for trials for IVP!...i am takin it easy..if i don get it..then lets jus be it...haiz..okok..wanna sleep...but gona post another one cos i want to intro this song...*have u ever-beandy*

...............things are goin wrong and wrong...bad and bad

i actually forgot to update my blog yesterday and went straight to bed instead...i think i am jus too tired...have been out till late almost the whole of this week...then i finally went to watch Spiderman 2...is damm nicec!!!! really very nicee and alittle funnny,exciting...and heart-poppin sencee....hahha....not wastin my money to watch that show....yupz...and i work school on fri SUCKS!! cos i was told to do some clay and present....WHAT THE!!and is like so crappy..and got one of the lecture only half an hour...might as well i don go anyway i also never listen to his lesson....then after that is that clay thingy..so damm crappy...i think i pissed that teacher off...then i went to watch movie and shop for awhile....then reach home super tired that i forget to blog...then today work...idiot sia...T1T forever SABO by their staffs...all call in say cannot come to work..then ask me to go there and work..my only mornin for the week..then like that have to work at T1...stupid sia...then saw farihan today i think he is super tired like that sia...then after that i was stationed at T1K...then is like so NO ppl...absouetly no PPL!!! then i practically clean the whole Kisok...really sia..my own kisok i also never clean until so clean...then after that went back outlet saw fad...then like funny ah...things werent the same...anyway,many things changed dont they?then i talk alittle with her only..then saw jeremy..then saw jeremy cousin at T1....like so fierce like that sia....hahahh....but a handsome lad...hahah....then work tml sia..then bcos of that cannot go and see ruzaini's match..sorry ah..but good luck ah...hahahha.....then met f4 jus now...so funny sia...TBL"s mum ZAI!!!! hahahahha..hahhahha...hahahha...then jasmine wee also changed alot like that...haha...ok lahz..ppl changed don they..i also think i changed..i wasnt as violent as i am now..i mean in WORDs...don know lahz...haiz...okie..eyes closin reawdy....want to sleep..workin tml again sia..haiz..okok..bye...ZZZzzzZZZzzZZZ

Pissed!!!

have a super pissed day yesterady!!so STupiddd!!!! haiz...cos i didnt update my blog in school cos i thought i could do that at home..but who the hell knows that my stupid com is down again..DOWN?? i don know why it is down again....so damm idiotic!!! haiz..then i have to waste my time to blog it duin my lesson..so stupid...ARGH~~~~~then yesterady was pissed by my class girls...so lame...discuss to wear mini short skirt together...how lame can they be??haha...and make me stay in the toilet for so long..cos i don wanna go out from the cubicle and let them know that i am inside....hahah...i also another stupid fellow..then lesson was super borin that i fell asleep..actually,it is the second time or maybe the first time that i cannot get along with my classmates..at least in secondary school we will still be okie with each other...she is so much worse the yvonne...hahah...then she make me miss sec sch more than ever....suddenly miss all the unity and the fun...how come i still miss sec sch so much..haiz...then yesterday had netball trainin..wahz...ran alot sia...then all the netball seniors are so drop-dead gorgeous....haha...they are so pretty...hehe...then i train and train and play and play the game...i really think that i can only play GD...cos if i play GK i like so slow and don know where to run..but if i play GD i don have good stamina...hehe...must train harder..and yesterday the sad thing is the soccer boys is not trainin as well..so sian...then i saw dragon boat ppl traini..so sian...haha....then now havin video lesson..have to edit or do somethin..aiyo..don knwo anythin sia...haiz...what am i doin? gettin into the correct course?haiz...miss 5B!!! guys...miss the fun!!!super tired yesterday...headache...back ache..arms ache... stomach muslce ache..whole body ache lahz...sian...but later i am goin to watch SPIDERMAN 2...finally sia...they after that will be mean girls but not sure when....anywany gonna hurry and catch the show before it is down...hahaa...hurray.......haiz...sec sch..sec sch...miss u..miss u..haha..crazy...but i gona write one song bout my sch!!hhahahha...haiz...okie..hope by the time i get home my com will be okie..and workin tml sia...so tired...haiz....i don know whether i miss out somethin anot..but cant remember ......(no laughters yesterday to make me laugh) hahahaha....okok...bye....write till here...............

what a day and pissed sia!!

days are same...things arent changed..lesson still carry on...ppl still passin by..clashes still happen...today was the earliest day i finish school..so me and two other of my sch fren decided to go town to shop and buy some shirts or whatever...actually when i reach my block i saw class 1b/22 students so i thought maybe i might see hakimi or iqbal...but never see....then we went into class...then i was like tellin my fren :"eh...i think hakimi next door eh".....haha..ya..they havin video lesson then me same again havin that borin java lesson..then i wonder why some students from that class went to like see the digital cam....but there are some stay in class..then i think he saw methen we like smile smile....don know lahz..then after that never see him again...then today lesson was totally borin!!then we watch music video in the computer...cool..hahaha...watch matchbox 20,usher,bon jovi,avril....ahaha.....then sayin about the part goin town...say already also sianz...also don know why...cos i went down....took out some money..intend to shop for some clothes or anythin else...but in the end never get anythin..so frustrated...and i wasnt even window shoppin...is like walkin..wat the...then feel like not happy..cos i go there for a motive but was successful...haiz..nothin to buy sia...they feel so tired and lethargic....they when on the way i walked to PS....i thought maybe i walked and see whether bani is there..but i saw someone cool....but i don think is him...and i went to have a closer look and i don think is him...and at that point of time...i remember the look and smile of bani...haiz...don know lehz...i wanted to say...time really can heal all wounds...last time i don believe...but now i do..but the bad part is....the time u take to heal the wound..u might only need one month...but worse will be maybe a year?but slowly the wounds will be heal..but a scar will always be left deeply unheal...*is the same logic as u fall down...then it bleed...then it hurts..then it take a few days to recover with feelin the pain..but the scar will always be left there..if u are lucky the scar will be gone..but if u are not...the scar will be deeply still intact* it will show how hard or how deep u fall.....and u will always be reminded that why u fall and who are the ppl that make u fall..thats the bad part of it..memories of this fall cant be erased...and i don know what i am doin also...jus hope that i wont lost contact with ena,ana and ruzaini...cos they were the closet frens which accompany me thru my loneliness time....and ena lets see things in a brighter  and optimistic side...~~Look on the bright side of life~ haha...and we wont lose contact no matter what..and hope siew hui they all will be workin hard and scorin well for their As...is important and stressful sia...but i believe they can do it!! all the best.....hmmm...havin netball trainin tml...hope i can tan han thru..havin body aches everywhere..esp my stomach..when i laugh so pain....haiz..hahah..okok...uuntil here....

BORING!!!

AHHHH....is so boring now!!!nothing to do...JAVA lesson again..hahha...borin...but today lesson ends early...end at 2..and goin to town to shoppin.YEAH!!! haha..and now..in class i got nothin to update about cos i did it at home last night..jus want to complain about my borin lesson..then today saw some handsome and cute guy in school..*did u all hear correctly? C.p sayin that there are some handsome guys in her school...ya there is....they attract me by their smile..hahhaha...and their wearin..haha..nice eh..at least is gettin better...then tml got netball trainni....hehe...and i thinkin whether i should join floorball as well..then i will be takin two sports at the same time..hehe..thinkin bout it only..hehe...ok stop here...update at night...

what a nice lyrics....

Oh my god,i am not yet asleep and now i listen to this song..the lyrics is damm good..and her songs lyrics everytime make me sad although the song is not sad....haiz....this lyrics is wonderful!!!
So much for my happy endingOh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
Let's talk this over It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did? Was it something You said?Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so highOn such a breakable thread
You were all the things I thought I knewAnd I thought we could be
[Chorus:]
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost itAnd all the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy endingOh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
You've got your dumb friends
I know what they sayThey tell you I'm difficult
But so are theyBut they don't know meDo they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
You were all the things I thought I knewAnd I thought we could be
[Chorus:]You were everything, everything that I wantedWe were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost itAnd all the memories, so close to me, just fade awayAll this time you were pretendingSo much for my happy endingOh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
It's nice to know you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

same..same..same...

Nothing new....is tue...and trainin ...oh i mention ready..hahhaha....alamak blur ah...hahaha...then today wake up half an hour late...cos too tired sia...then maths...lecture don say..don understand anything at all....give up..and surprisin..lynette msg me...so shocked..hahha....and TBL...haha..don say only..so fuunny...then today PISSED off with my class girls...they anyhow only...i was late...and today i wear my jeans but fold the bottom ah..then wear black shirt then wear my black cap...then i was alittle late..then when i came in ..they were like jeerin at me!! eh...what is that for??? not happy with me tell me ah...don talk or gossip behind my back...dare do it in front of me ah..then i gave them those pissed off stares....then what sia..want to be those popular girls in class...go be it ah...no one is snatchin that from u...want to be popular go ah..i am not stoppin u....but if u cant be..means u cant lahz..u don have that style to be anyway..early in the mornin make me pissed...but i am not angry jus alittle fed up..i took another of my fren...i will be super pissed and fed up is when the day i really fight with them...we shall wait and see then....spoilt the early of my day...then i also don know what they told those guys in my class lahz..seems like i do somethin they will laugh at me...but WHO CARES!! whatever they want to do....they think they got the STYLE...PLS LAHZ...look at yourself in the mirror....i look i am not pretty...but u are not too...so lets chill k....i know u are slim i am not....but i will be...and now i am determine to be!! jus wait and see.....okie..enuff of the anger....lets talk some happy stuffs...today i got 2 hours break but dawn they all don have...then the next one hour...i was alone...but but...hakimi saw me and ask me whether i want to join him and his frens to library..haha...then okie lahz..join ah..anyway i got no frens...haha...at least got someone to talk to...hehe...then we also never really talk ah...but i can see he is really into SOCCER...haha...so i can ask him anythin bout that...and his laugh ah...super contagious sia..he laugh will tickle me and make me laugh also...so it kinda of make my day..hehe...then meet up with ena and ana..and went to pizza hut..oh gosh...where am i growin...horizontally sia..hahhahaha.....then saw khairi..but when i go tampines..i already got the feelin will bump into him...hahahha....okie...then i think today havin late night sleep again..thats the pro when my com is alive again..hahah....*clay aiken and kimberlylocke - without you* ZZZzzzZZZ....

i am back again!!

ARGH!!!i jus finish writin then post...then it didnt came out..then have to write again..but i don care i want to write..cos i want ot say i am back again in the night..heheh..cos my com is back again...is alive!!haha...then today is the first time i feel a little happy in POLY!cos i had my first netball trainin today after i got selected but i am not tryin to be too happy yet..cos they goin to narrow the ppl for the com in sept....then somemore the soccer boys also have their trainin the same as us sia...BUt....i don understand in sec sch..the soccer team start their trainin later than us but end earlier than us...don understand why...NOT FAIR...hahha...cos poly one..they only start half an hour earlier and end earlier than us sia..netball is always the one which end very late..i end at 9 like that sia..by the time i get home is like so late ready sia..haiz..then today got soem basketball girls come and train..they no need to go for the trial and jus get in like that...wat sia..nvm ah...get it like that..but ah..they super noisy..u know lahz..BASKETBALL!! DUH!!!what sia..jus that sch don have basketball for girls thats why join netball..wahat sia..so noisy...then i have yet to see who is the captain for soccer cos he bears the same name as BANI...hahhaa...then oh yha..one important thing..i bought the REAL MARID adidas sweater..COOL ah..heeeheeh...maybe that partly the reason i am also happy about..then next thing is the topshop shirt..hehee....okok..goin to ZZZzzzZZZ soon..if not tml cannot wake up...okok..hope this one is publish successfully....

i am back

hey..once again..i am back at night....why? cos my com is alive again..haha..so happy...then today is the first time i felt that is happy to be in poly..cos i had my first netball trainin after got selected...then it was fun..and somemore what interesting is that...netball trainin on monday clash with the soccer guys...oh my god...they are all like so handsome..but like quite short sia...but all got style ah...good ah..can train and see guys at the same time..haha...and also see the soccer...i also don understand somethin...in sec sch..we start trainin earlier than soccer but they end earlier than us...then in poly soccer only like start their trainin half an hour earlier than us but also finish so early...NOT FAIR!!hahaha...haha...but good sia..can see them...but yet to find out who is the captain of the soccer team..cos he bears the same name as bani..hahah...i anyhow only..then today at trainin i hyper sia...hahah..also don know why...hahha....maybe i like to run and run and run...then don know lahz..this few basketball girls come and join netball...wat sia..so noisy....haiz...sian sia...sch no basketball girls then join netball....and idiot sia..ppl say i look like basketball players...i hate it..cos i hate basketball....!!!oh ya...somethin i have to say..i got my REAL MADRID adidas sweater ready sia!!haha...thats partly the reason i am happy..hehe...nice sia...hehhe....and recently i sometimes are feelin down also don know why..and today the person's laughter i never hear..but i am pretty happy today..hope is a sign for a good start...hehe.... *_-okok...sleepin soon....*listenin to Arvil - my happy endin.* nice song...
 

two days many things can happen...........

Two days many things can happen.....SAT-> went to work in the morning..HATE IT! i was being ask to attached to T1T cos not enuff ppl there...it SUCKS man!!to the core!!!..only 3 ppl includin me..but there not as slam as my outlet one ah...the ppl there wasnt very friendly and fun...i tolerate bcos maybe i deserve it...then i feel alittle bad cos afternoon shift not enuff ppl...then saw FAD!Everything changed..who say it is gona be the same...maybe i am sorry for that the things i said is too vicious and violent but that was eventually what i felt..Fad sorry again.Anyway,take care cos i don think we will be seein each other alot....and at night i went to watch RUZAINI's SILAT match....and i saw this cute little adidas boy...keep running and playin around!SO CUTE...haha...there are also some handsome malay guys lahz....hahahha.....
then,RUZAINI won! YEAH! haha...then sun i work in the morning again...not enuff staff work..but it was pretty fun and okie bcos the manager is kak elly...then i fep up with this new girl sia...she only know how to do service but don know hot to wash the plates and everything ah...idiot sia...she service then i stuck inside kitchen washin....FED UP!but yesterday at least i did  cashier,wasnt pissed by any customers...then after work went town...although very tired but want to look around for some of my things...and i really want to get the REAL MARDRID sweater...i am serious..hahah....hope when i buy still got...then today character development lesson is so boriing..haiz..my class girls are all so lame!!!haiz...
then i realised there are some friends that i don treasure and wont sacrifice cos they dont deserve it...and some friends come and go as they like...whenever i am busy this girlfriend of mine will come into my life,but whenever i am free she will be out of my life...i am not tryin to be bad but i find it is true....i am not some person or thing to replace any missin parts in her life...haiz...friends come and go,a few will stay...maybe i am those that are friends with everyone....but somehow it is difficult to have a best fren by my side...hai..how pathetic can i be...anyway...good news...i got into netball...today is the first trainin...hehe...don knwo whether i can cope...good luck to me...

wow~~NEW THINGS!!!!

wow...u see orange color..now  can write usin colors!!!good...so i can use my fav color...hahhahahaa...so happy to see the new thingy!!!hahahaha...havin video lesson..hehe...fun!!but damm cold...ar~~~ar~~~freezin..haha...then yesterday was the first time i left school at a very late time..i left school at nine plus and miss the chinses show..so sad..but i never miss my meteor garden..oh my god..is so touchin and i cried again...hehe..love them....they ROCKS!! hehee...happy endin finally for the whole of them all..heheh...YEAH~~then tml got the netball trial..before the trial i was damm excited...but when i reached there my mood not so high ready...also don know why...but a lot of gorgeous babe!!really...they are all very pretty..woow....but what am i?? hahah....then yesterday also  damm tired....that someone's never laugh..so nobody make my day..hahhahha...hahahha....jokin ah...hmm...then the result fot the shortlisted netballers are not out yet..they say they will call...but i think i play not bad ah...think only..but i miss to tap a few balls...SHIT! haiz...if not it will be nice..heheh...and i fell down man...oh my god!!so paiseh...hehe...but also nothin much..then if i really get into netball the trainin will be on monday and thur until 9 sia..then i will miss FRIENDS and THE O.C....alamak....how come sia...but i might not get what...hahaha..then so fast another week passed....while studyin time passed really fast...that i didnt realise that it has been 1 weeks and 5 days i never msg bani..and i never even have the time to remember him...and oh ya..i have been wantin to say that....there was a moment of time that i thought i was smart enuff to judge ppl and know them well...but  now i am not again....don know...maybe some ppl are easy to judge well some are not...haha...i don know what is goin on wrong with myself anyway....but at the first place do i know how to judge ppl? someone told me that i am very gullible..what ppl say i think all is true...i don suspect that it has any motive behind it...but i realise if i don trust that person i wont be really believe everythin he/she said....ya...the moral is TRUST is very important regardless if it is to your friends...your lover...or ever your parents....so...don ever break the trust ppl have put on u....okie..havin java programmin lesson now...java java and more java...now havin whole body ache...really too long never play ready...hahahahah..okie.i stop here....workin tml..SIAN!!!! haiz....

nothin new....

everyday post..nothin new..everything the same...but FUYOU!! my handphone bills reach to its climax...is $145!!!this is my first time my handphone bills reach until so high sia...i have to tell my mum that i pay half of it then she never scold me..if not she confirm scold one...hahhaah...then yesterady went running again..cos today i am havin netball trial...i know last minute trainin wont help..but who say i am havin last mintue trainin..i have been runnin whenever i am free..but no one knows..hahahha...jus hope today i will get selected..if i am not..should i stay cca-free or should i get another cca??FLOORBALL???with najiba??i got no ideas what other cca i want to join..there are no soccer womens..so sad..hahah...but seriously..girls wearin caps attract attention right?cos everyone keep starin at you if u wear a cap..jus like i am being stare throughout the day in school..haiz..havin this borin java practical...so borin...not payin attention at all...haiz...no hope...what am i comin to school for?hai..but only excited about the netball trial later...good luck to myself then..hmm...then i think nothin more to write ready right....and finally FRIENDSTER is back to normal..hahha...someone's laughter can make my day!! hehe.. :)

morning!!!

now is 10.30 in the morning...havin java programmin again!!SIANZ!forever this lesson...today i am not late but early...hahaha...not scared of late..jus came out of house early cos there is nothing for me to do at home...thanks to my brother..he never take back his discman..then i got music to accompany me for the whole borin journey...then yesterday went joggin..actually,i jog not bcos i want to slim down but i feel by joggin it really sort of and a little of release stress..and yesterday really feel so stress that i can understand why some ppl smoke...it doesnt make u forget somethin..but it take up some of your time...like what khairi said..to distract u..so that u wont think of things for the time being....oh...ya..then yesterday,i have this friend..he sort of make alittle of my day..cos his laugh very contagious...hahah...today i wear until very slack sia..really slack...hehe..and yesterday got ~SOMEBODY SAVE ME~~hahah...smallville...clark kent..oh ya..and i saw "CLARK KENT" in my school..haha..ashraf lahz..hahaha...saw him in school...hehe..he really has a smile of clark kent..hehehe..hahaaa....tml i have netball trial..so excited..hope i get in..if never get in..what i join?? FLOORBALL??? or Hockeyyyyyy~~hahhaha.....okie..stop here..i think tml i still got com session to update my blog....and my com is still DOWN!!!how to do my assignment???

haiz what is goin wrong with me?

i really don know what is goin wrong with me?...thought i could start a good week this week cos this will be the 2nd week of school and everyone should have settle down and be more fun..but monday for me was a bad start that start off the bad week for me...have this audio lesson on monday which i don quite understand and we are required to make and edit a music that last for a min..maybe to ppl a minute is short..but now for me a mintue is so damm long...then meet up with ena,ruzaini and the rest....but i still don know whats botherin me..feelin somethin heavy in my heart but i jus cant explain what it is...anyway,havin the java programmin lesson now..sometimes i wonder will i fail this sem that i will be retained..cos maths is difficult...java programminm is difficult...edit audio is difficult..edit viedo is difficult..storyboardin is diffcults..cos i am not as creative as ena..and have not many ideas like ruzaini does...sometimes i feel that i am not suitable for this course...haha...but take a step and see ah...haiz..but today java one..was okie..i create my name PEI with java and not PAINT!!!and today i think i piss kak elly off..cos i call in to change my schedule for sat to morning..then she told me that too many staffs in the morning..then i say got something in the night ah..then she say "i told u u workin afternooon then u still make plans" then i say ah...i did msg u and tell u that i want either fri or sat midnight or sat and sun morning..but when i saw afternoon i thoyught got no plans then i anything ah...but got plans rigght..now i am confused don know whether i mornin or afternoon cos she never really give me a definite answer....so how now? i also not sure..haiz...then i think this all feel days emo gettin over me...hahaha....also don know why...waken up from a dream yet another jus came.....i don know lahz..maths is so difficult that i feel like crying...haiz..don know lahz..then somemore today i woke up late again..got lesson at 9 but wake up at 8.20..then thouught of skippin lecture..but maths ah..cannoot..so decided to take cab..and again is cost me more than last time..$18!!!$18!!i can buy a cd!!okie..stop here...

reasons why i haven been postin

haiz..sian..haven been posting for quite sometime..bcos MY COMPUTER IS DOWN AGAIN!!! damm...now in school havin audio lesson..is cool..get to edit my own music..hehe..next time can be a music editor..KWUANG!KWUANG!...hai..when my com is bad i got alot of things to update..wait for it!!hehe...lessons is pretty borin..alot of things on my mind...hai..okok...stop here first if not kanna spotted!!hashaa....wait for my next blog!!

haiz...SIAN..WHY AM I DOIN IN THAT BLOODY SIAN SCHOOL!!

ARGH~~~~AH~~~~~~haiz..really totally sian...second day of school...what is poly life?so this is it..poly life is jus goin to lectures,goin to tutorial,ppl tryin to get attention from each other,wearin fancy clothes to school,makin no frens...WHY DO I WANT THIS KIND OF LIFE??NO!!i don want it anymore...i seriously hate SP to the core...i hate my course to the core too...haiz..too bad..wasnt any other course that interest me either...but why am i torturin myself?i don even like the ppl in my poly of even my class...maybe i am too old for them..or should i say mature??some are still so Chi.....haiz..jus cant click...then somemore i thought at least i got this fren DAWN..i thot she was quite okie..haha...really cannot judge a person by its look eh..or should i say i should really get to know that person before knowin whether he/she could be trusted...ppl are cunnin..and u werent know whether who those ppl are...not fun in school..no more laughters for me..no more happiness for me..no more fun for me..who the hell say POLY LIFE IS FUN!! WHAT THE F**K...the life sucks there...ppl can live without fren but me?? u think i can?? haha..maybe i shall try then...then all the lectures make me want to sleep..alamak..i nearly dose off at times...not enuff of sleep i should say..and i really admire myself for endurin the lesson until 4 in the afternoon..amazin eh..POWER TO THE NATION!!!I know i should say it again..but i regret choosin this damm idiot poly...cos things are so not what i think it should be..is not fun at all!!!why is this so??haiz..tired of smilin even though i don even like to do so...why am i like this now? i thought cheerful was what i really can describe myself about?maybe slowly i am growin up and becomin more aware of what happenin around me..somethin that even though i find it kinda of hard to accept,i have to learn to accept somehow.why things jus cant get better for me since Os...is has been so bad that i don even know what am i livin for? for myself? then what do i wish for?do i know? i don even have any idea for that..terrible isnt it...somethings happen that i find it hard to accept,sometimes feelings developed that u cant control...things havent been goin alright...and i think i have been make a fool of myself today..don wanna think about it anyway...spend an hour of break alone today..hmm..sometimes i think do i deserve this? did i do alot of bad things in the past??did i??haiz..don know lahz..maybe i am to used to havin too much funs in school..always surrounded by funs and laughters and more fun...right?and many things have changed..i cant imagine how much more it will or will changed right? haiz..slowly hatin school..slowly hatin life and slowly hatin myself for cant do things right...started my maths lesson..i thought maths was somethin i can handle..but i was wrong..maybe i did not pay much attention in class...cos i nearly fell asleep...then i don know how to do some sums..haiz..stress sia..who say POLY WAS RELAX??idiot..it wasnt at all!!don know how am i goin to survive my 3 years there..hope 3 years passed very fast..Ya..everyone..come lets scold me for choosin SP as my choice..come scold me for havin to travel such a long distance to sch..scold me for havin to bear with all the ppl..everythin really have a changed...then when will it be my turn to changed? changed into a nasty girl...can i? haha..who knows..maybe i will......okie..wish me good luck tml..another bad day to go!!!

tired..real tired? why am i torturin myself?

i am really tired today..super..i also not sure why i torture myself so much...i am not in need of money or whatsoever..why am i workin so hard for? for nothin..mainly jus to keep myself busy..aint i doin that?havin whole body ache...backache espcially!!*wish someone could help me message my back* hahahha...(dream on CP)...hahah...then tml startin the first day of school but i am arent excited at all...haiz..why is that so?cos i am goin to a new enviroment with strangers that i am so tired of..keep makin new frens in life...i can even maintain still havin my old frens by my sidee then i want to go and make new frens...what for??have to put on a smile when i don feel like...have to go along with some crappy joke when i think it isnt worth the laugh and the effort..havin to put some happy face when i am arent happy at all...have to go along with everyone when sometimes i want to be alone...now,feel like peace is the best...then today work tired sia..haiz...then waitin for the match which i think i gona sleep by then before the match even started..then tml i really scared i could wake up...wish to have a wake up call...hahah..have to wake up..now my eyes closin le..hahaha...then jus now msg some of my frens who reopen sch tml..then i msg bani too..the same msg ah..then i don understand how come all long his replies are all short...could he type somethin longer...haiyo...haha..but at least he replied...hehe..better then he heck care...later the match jus hope . greece will win..i wouldnt want portugal to win!!haha..then today also nothin much happenin..i think i will give the match a miss..cos really very sleepy...haha...hmmm...lets hope greece win..and hope tml i will have a great day in school..*headache...thinkin of what to wear to school tml....haiz..got uniform better right..no need to think..haiz...then somemore tml after school workin sia...from 6-11..i really sia ah...i am not in need of money but work so hard..but i also hope to buy the adidas real madrid sweater..jhehehheeheh..okoko..stop here...wanna go sleep...check out my blog tml about my sch!! hahahahahah....

wahz...borin day

i really have to say sorry to miss wong..cos we were supposed to go sentosa for cyclin but i could wake up..and i don know whats wrong with me?could get up sia..haiz..really need a wake up call everyday if i am goin sch sia..sorry..i miss out the fun!!haiz..then i sleep till 12+ then after that online ah..then went to work at 3...was alittle late..then i feel like whole body ache sia..especially my hand muscle..cos yesterday did EB for very long hours...haiz..then today at kisok..then i feel bad sia..make adibah stay until 6 when she is suposed to go at 4..and bcos of this..rahim have to wait for long sia..then adibah say she tell rahim to come early..then i am like..no need lahz..but who knows rahim really came about 45 mins earlier sia..feel so bad sia..cos i don know why i super blur today...everythin also like not in my mind..also don know what i am thinkin about..haiyo..then make adibah stay then make rahim came early..bad ah...thanks to the both of them..my life-saver..hehehe...and when i retake eng 'O' level..same sch as adibah sia..good...hehe...then alone at kisok..seems like the crowd nowadays non-stop sia..haiyo..then busy until 9+ then got time to rest sia..tired sia..then tml workin somemore then monday schoolin..OH YA!!and idiot!!i change class sia..from 22-> to 23 sia..i also don know why...but at first when i know i 22 i were like thinkin how come not 23 beckham's real madrid no mahz..then who knows really 23 sia..but i don know anyone in that class.stupid sia..also don know why changed class..stupid...haiz..jus hope it is a better one..haha..not excited at all!!!gettin on fine with the ppl already i mean in work...don know lahz..seems like i miss somethin out to write...then i think i should stop here..workin tml..tired ah..somemore tml short of staffs...confirm SLAM!haiz...i think after i can my this month pay if that real madrid special edition adidas sweater stil got right..maybe i get it ah...ok? -_< .. hehe...the song i am currently listenin is westlife-if your hearts not in it...nice...listen if u havent..bye..nitezz to myself..

wahz..so late...

wahz..so late now or should i say early??haha...i jus came back from work sia..then i tour around singapore for 2 hours..cos i finish work at 1am..then got a small van drive us home..then inside got like 10 ppl..i am unlucky cos the uuncle live in puggol..so i shall be the last to reach home..so sad and i am so tired but still decided to post it here..but at first i was allow to go home at 11..then was told that not enuff staff for midnight ah...then say farihan not comin work..but in the end i saw him..haha...he said somethin which i don understand..hahah..then kahi work midnight..then today is sec sch youth day celebration and i intended to go back..but i overslept...supposed to wake up at 7 then my alarm woke me up..but i stil continue sleepin..then wake up at 9.20..and i suppose to meet TBL and vinson at 9...then i told him i cannot meet them and go le..haiz...so paiseh sia..nowadays keep wakin up late..go sch also late..go anywhere also late..haiz...then in the mornin i met lydia they all for breakfast..not a bad one..cos we long time never see each other..then after that i met ahmad together with ena and ruzaini to talk...all the meetings that i had ttoday wasnt a bad one...quite okie..then today saw the STARBUCKS guy..sheena...starbucks guy..hahahhahaa....then i supoose to have to collect one more stamp to redeem a free drink then i think he stamp that one for me also...so good..hahaha....haha..right?then i saw quite alot of ppl today...today should be a not bad day for me arent it? then went to work ...wahz..so tired sia..stuck in EB station again..for very long..while steamin milk my hand will also shakin..no energy sia..haiz..but ah..all my shots..overshot..haiz...hahaha....tonight the midnight ppl quite funn...but kak elly don want to put me midnight..then put me in the afternoon...and firdaus and lukeman quit already sia..no good sia..haiz...then cannot work with firdaus anymore..a joker he is..GEMOK!!hahahhahaha....okok..too tired..goin sentosa tml..hope i can wake up..lucky tml kisok!!haha..but fad not workin tml..bored again...hahah...got her i complain no her i also complain..i am jus too hard to be pleased..okok..good night to myself..bye ...C.P.....hahhaha.....

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no tittle it shall be...wat am i gona do..havin mixed feelin todday...happy for awhile then sad for the whole day..and tired for the rest of the day..i thot this blog should help me to vent my fusration on or watsoever..but what i bring myself was more trouble..haiz..this blog was revealed!!i thot it might be a good idea..but i was totally wrong...it should never be revealed....revealin this course alot of misunderstandin and everythin..i didnt think that things would go so bad..haiz..thot i would be havin a fun day today but was wrong again..had flag day for school..then our station supposed to be at boon keng..but don know somehow some decided to go farrer park which is NO PPL at all..then end up eatin around the area there and took train back to somerset to try our luck but is that there are too many "our own ppl" no choicee have to shift..then we went toa pahyo...then is wasnt so bad..i manage to collect 73 bucks...then after that i meet tbl and went orchard to walk...saw alot of things to buy again sia..then i saw this real madrid sweater..oh my god*jaws drop*is was so fantasically so nice and gorgeous..thinkin should i get it?moreover is special edition...then postin my blog add was a mistake..a total mistake...ended up to more saddnes..*FAD...i am sorry if some of my words are too violent or hurtful*but somehow sayin all those "SUCKS F**K!!" this is the only place which i can say it or rather write it out..cos i don scold vuglar..so i have to write it out!!thats why some part might seem violent and hurtful..jus hope things that are over are over...lucky sat i at kisok wont be seein u...if not i don know how to face u...jus need tto write it down here so that i wont have all the feelin stuck or hidden in my heart..cos some things i don have frens to turn to...i am so sorry..postin my add was definitely a mistake!!i didnt know that it landed my fren in ...........what am i goin to do?feelin like deletin this blog webbie..okok..can i say somethin happy for awhile...i went to OR ORCHARD...then wanted to take alook whether bani is there..and turns out to be he is there..then i went over and say hi to him cos i might not have more time to see him..cos sch startin soon...then i went over and talked to him..luckily he was alone..and my legs were alittle wobbly when i walked over*blush*..then we talked...after that he make a drink for me..it was nice..with the chocolate bits..had quite a nice chat..haha..so funny..i from sales line want to change to F&B line...then he from F&B line want to change to sales line..haha...he really have a nice smile..but i think he got GF ready..but it good to be fren anyway...hehe...okok...i donknow lahz..feel like gettin away from everyone now...feels like i want to be alone!!! goin somewhere no one knows me...jus like the meteor gardeen....SHANCAI...then hope LEI(wonder who will that be)will come and find me..hehe...that was a nice show..love is amazin arent it??

today listen to this song again..so sad..Vitamin C-graduation song,is like the lyrics is jus so suitable for any graduation...so sad...really miss sec sch and u guys alot...

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And i keep thinking of that night in june
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon and there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

1:
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change, come whatever
We will still be, friends forever

So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money
When we look back now, will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, i keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there? can we make it somehow?
I guess i thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round?
Will these memories fade when i leave this town
I keep, i keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

Emo today....

haiz...today supposed to go sch for the orientation programme..but i really couldnt pull myself up from my bed..then i jus heck care and continue sleepin and never go school..anyway,i think it will also be a waste of time goin sch for that orientation programme...haiz..then somemore tml flag day..then i kanna BOON KENG Mrt station..jus hope that maybe bani need to go sch to settle somethin before goin to work..then maybe i will see him there...haha..i am dreamin too much..then i wake up and play computer until 3+ then my mum today took half day off..then i intend to go ikea cos i need to buy stuffs or boxes to keep my sec sch stuffs..too much thing that i cant bear to throw..then my dad went to pick her..then she called back ask me to get ready..then i say i go bath ah..then when she reached home,she change her clothes..then when jus about to get out of the house,she say"i took half day off intend to stay at home and rest" then i like...ok lahz..don want to go ready..then she says nvm,jus go..then i not happy..then i say don want lahz..don disturb me..i don want to go ready...then never go..then i am like thinkin..if u don want to go jus say lahz..still ask me to bath get ready..wat the!!then i am like thinkin if never go,later i go jog..then still want to make me bath..then i not happy with her...never talk to her...then i watch tv,went joggin,came back watch tv,bath..then went out..i went to meet my ex-collegues..too bad eve never go..if not i surely happy one..but at least chris went..hmm...chris become more good-lookin..maybe i like the sun-burned look ion his face and his hair...ya..then i thought that intend not to eat one..but still eat...see my stomach blugein out now..haiz...sian sia..then now abit sleepy ready..but waitin for the soccer match..holland VS portugal...i really hope HOLLAND will win..cos their jersey is my fav. colour..orange and i want portugal to lose cos they make england lose...haiz..then so sian sia..nothin to do..then khairi also like very weird..keep askin me whether i am okie..whether i am fine...but i am okie..nothin wrongs with me...haha...then i check my workin schedule...both fri and sat 4pm-1am...then sat alone at kisok somemore..haiz..then i don understand why fad also never kanna until 1 but i kanna..i think CBTL "love" me so much...then suhaidah ask me to go clubin that day..then i don want to follow.first waste money..then second i alittle scared...hehe..timid ah..then really sian now..nothin to do..waitin for the match..hope my eyes doesnt close by that time..then today no one to chat with me...yesterday so many..today don have..haiz..pathetic...nvm..maybe i do my maths...haiz..okie lahz..hope holland win.."ruzaini score a goal ah"hahhahha.....ARGH~~~gettin fatter and fatter!!!!! :(