don know where to put my face!

alright..got alot alot alot of things to say, but some cant be published! haha...

but anyway, working life.. i all long thought, wahz..working life, something i have always wished for. like being a career woman? have my own career, car, my status, sounds great.
but this attachment make me realise alot alot of reality in working world, no one will pity you like we sympathy with our own classmates, no one will help you if u ever need any, no one will care your death or survival. what they think is themselves, whether they excel in the company, whether they earned what they should, whether they gain the trust from their superior, whatever they will be recognised. they have only themselves, they jus think of themselves, no one will pity you, you have to earn what you get. thats simple but cruel. isnt it?

attachment, before i stepped into ATTACHMENT, i was thinking, wahz..working life, at least i get to experience what it really is. but now, i don want that. is getting tiring..have to handle alot alot of things. beside working from 8.30 to 6...mon and thurs i have to go back training. though i really once wanted to give up, maybe thats the place i get divert my stress and unhappiness in that sports and jus give all out.. by the time i reach home is 7..i am so tired...wakin up is the killing part...

before everythin, i was still thinking, oh..maybe after i graduate, i could work firsrt before studying again...but now i never have that thought..i don wanna work! i think i wont be mentally prepared.!!

and i am so so so so so ashamed now!! right now!! argh....hahaha..