the worst day of my life

the worst day of my life..and as well as for jiayi..for her not only that day itself...it lasted for almost a month..feel so bad...haiz..just find it that it hasnt been a smooth start of the year for her..mine might not be that bad..i still have jiayi and cher around...we always make fun of cher and make her suffer in the end..haha..guess my words sometimes are too rude...but friends can one right..haha..excuses..

one particular day was the worst day of my life...why? supposedly to be out helpin my brother find jeans...but in the end..the series of event that happen make me lost my mood and become so bored!! startin from hearin jiayi's drivin stupid instructor...followed by her itp...followed by my unexpected guest..slowly it tires me out...once bad luck came upon u, u wont be able to shake it off... things are like that...

a new chinese year begins..i seriously hope with the start of a new chinese year, my life will totally have a new start..i am so bored leading the life i had now..maybe it would be difficult for me to change my lifestyle i used to have..but i am gettin tired of it..but i will never get tired of cher and jiayi..they are really the best gifts i had since i enter poly..i always hope to forget the past and move on..but i always couldnt do it...i hate myself for doing so..but i have no control over it.. always hearing meaningful quotes and phrase from vairous people.. i always think over what was been said and understand it.. alot of logical stuffs applies to the life we had..we live... i miss alot of things..though things have changed!! i hope in a new year everythin will change for a better...always wished for a better life..but i never got it.. always the tiring one,always the weak one,always the poor one..why am i always the bad one?

along the road i regretting doing and not doing alot of things..but i cant always stop there and never stand out of the boundaries.. i stil have to move on to experience more life and environment.. and have more fun with me.. i should abandon those things that i cant bear to part with or forget it...altough sayin is always easier than doin...i always manage to say what i wanna do out but i always never carry out my plans..i hate myself...i have no good points at all! felt so sad..
life is so disappointing..

there were once a period of time when i cant see my future..i cant see what i am in the next one year.. i cant imagine what i live for...jus to study work sleep eat and marry ? i don think this is a perfect life i am searchin for..i want to have a life i felt meaningful too.. everyone is living each day passed each day...some never even planned for their future and just carry out with their plan..seein future is important..i hope to be have a meaningful and lively life ahead of me...


cher and jiayi!! love u guys...take care and happy chinese new year..

happy chinese new year to everyone..