Sometimes, you just wants to be alone.

Thank you wei wei… that’s very sweet of you. But now, Australia got a couple of suspected swine flu, so I better stay away from Aussie. Hahahaha.. kidding la… I will go there by myself before you are all ready to come back. Then, I will be able to travel around myself, it will be so cool! JThank you!!

wei wei, I am not actually waiting for someone to appear, I am searching for my soul back… haha… that someone can appear or can just disappear, doesn’t matter much to me though.. I believe what’s most important to be now is grabbing my soul back and get on with what I want to do. Now, it occurs to me that I don’t have the courage to pursue my dream that I have been talking all about. Is not about able and not able, is all about whether I am daring or not daring. Perhaps, not at this stage, I still have to finish my degree to secure myself and earn my pride. That’s the purpose of it, isn’t it. I think this 2 years, I have been trying to be myself, and all about myself that I lost touch with getting to know people or being friends. I believe I was once a good friend to my friends, but now I don’t know how to be a friend anymore. The more I am your friend, the more I am not a friend. I am not a caring friend, not a nice friend, not a easy-going friend anymore. Why is it so? I was too occupied with myself that I threw that part of me away. Dumped it all…. I guess my balancing failed badly. Ah wei posted a superb old school picture on facebook and I got a shock! Who is that girl?!! God, don’t mention anybody else, I don even recognize myself, I lost that smile, lost the freedom of smile, lost the happy go lucky feel…. Whoa! Yea, can’t deny that I change a lot. Tremendously. I don’t hate my change, but I hate it when I am lost again.

I wanna get out get out get out and be alone!