haiz...funny,vexed, things on my mind....thought that tml might be an interesting day...but i don know whether it will turn out well...the problem is i could not blog at home..i know that i got alot of things to write...but somehow when it comes to school i don know what i should blog...haiz...then benny very funny..this fellow forget the date msg me last night...so funny..someomore apologise to me...haha...hey...i am so glad he remembered rather than forget...earlier wishes is better than never wish...but i am really very happy that he wished first....i was still thinkin who will be the first this year..cos the past two years is the same person wishin me the first time...hahaha...okie..wasnt expecting any big or much this year...yupz...hehe..
suppose to be a big one..cos 18 mahz..but no mood for that too..so many things..and got so many projects on hand still haven finished...
read sheena's blog yesterday..seems that the last part referring to me...yupz...true it is not point clappin ur own hand when the other party doesnt...and i realise now how come there are ppl and friends who lost contact when they entered poly or each going separate life and path....what they studyin is different,timetables is different,worklaod is different...everythin is different...thats make me and her drift further...everytime i wanted to lend a hand to either of my fren i know that i will stop in the middle cos i jus donhave the time to do it...i really got alot of work on hand..maybe sometimes i am findin excuses for myself..but i do need a break sometime..maybe by sayin this, i will lose some frens..is not like i need to be alone or need to have a long break..but sometime durin my busy schedule i need a break to take a breathe and catch up with what i am doin..and not keep tiring myself out like last time what i always did...i am jus torturin myself..LIVING TO TORTURE MYSELF?? thats outrageous...and i am those who arent initative...whenever it comes to friends or love...or even other things...i am those who doesnt call my fren up and say"hey wanna go out?" i odn know why i arent like that...i am those who wait...adn if no calls i am those who can go out alone..but i know i am those who cant survive alone...but...i don know what i want now...really don know..there are always so amny ppl i disappoint..i disappoint lydia they all, i disappoint fad,i disappoint danica, i disappoint of cos sheena....i don know...i know i shuoldnt disappoint them...but somehow i have this atitude towards them....sometime i can be very caring but sometimes my concern dies...i don know how to maintain the same always...it is jus this way it is...or am i such a bad person...haiz..sucsk..i sucks....i don know...i really donknow...

thought it iwll be a happy day tml...but i think likewise...oh ya...kyeo..u make a mistake ah..it isnt you so don worry k..hahaha...and ya..i am very busy recently...maybe i will ask for ur help soon..cos u holiday ready right..hahaha..aimin for ur help ready..hahahha...okie..see ya...hmmm....but i hope me cher and jiayi have many happy times ahead...they always make me laugh in school..i thought i wont laugh again..but they make me..hahaha....XTD ROCKS eh..ahhahahahah..... i miss the times in 5B now....hahhaha...
okie..stop till now..ehhee...